IMG_4323
Originally uploaded by Mrs. Piggs
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
What's our girl up to?
Okay, I know you all want to hear about Zadie. She's good. Lots of learning, and lots of challenges, as it should be.
I suggested that she might want to learn to play the drums, and she does. We talked a lot about the guitar, and a month later, she remembered the names of all the parts of the guitar. She remembers lyrics to songs, and is not too bad at melodies, either. The other day, we turned on a mix CD that a friend made me a long time ago, and as all the songs came on, she would say "Oh! I like this one!" I wondered if she would remember Proud Mary, which we used to listen to a lot, and she totally does. I can sing the first part of a line and she can finish it.
She loves books, and she is content to have me read poetry to her almost endlessly. She is recognizing some words, although learning to read isn't a matter of urgency to her. She recognizes all the letters and can make most of them in a pretty recognizable fashion. I spelled out her name for her the other day, and she wrote all the letters, although not all in the typical order. She does, however, seem to know that you write from left to write mostly, and she pretends to write notes regularly.
Physically, she has gained dexterity in the most unbelievable ways. She just brought home a bracelet, and of course she strung all 34 beads onto the pipe cleaner. I watched her at the park on Sunday, the park we've been going to for years, and suddenly she can shinny up the steep steps, trot across the balance beam (the same balance beam that I used to have to walk with her, letting her clutch my index fingers!), and hop onto the digger. She's graceful, easy, strong, fast... She amazes me.
And, as she has continued to be strong-willed, creative, and logical, life with her is sometimes very hard. She does a lot of limit-testing, probably more than most kids, but less than the kids on SuperNanny. Sometimes she can be perfectly pleasant and sweet and loving, and other times she can be a screaming maniac, and then worst, she can be nonchalantly bitchy. One of her recent refrains is "No. I won't do anything for you." This is delivered in a perfectly aloof tone with her eyebrows raised and looking off into the distance past you.
Tonight, for example, she was delaying bedtime -- nothing new. She ran off a couple times, refused to go to the bathroom, so I got serious. I said fine, she didn't have to go potty, I would just put her nighttime diaper on. And she flipped. She yelled, she kicked, she said "go away" (which is about the worst curse she knows). I asked her several times to tell me what was wrong, and she warbled incoherently. She tried to run from the room. Finally, FINALLY, we got her to tell us what was wrong: she had to go potty.
While she sat there, I told her a story about two sisters. One wanted to hold hands, but she didn't tell her older sister, so the older sister never took her hand. She got madder and madder and used mean words until finally she said what she wanted. Then, of course, the older sister was happy to hold hands.
Zadie calmed down a lot and listened. Then she wanted to pretend to be the sisters, so we did. She apologized for not saying what she wanted, and I told her I felt a lot better, and I loved her. She loves me, too.
We've also had to ask her to say "final answer" when she makes a decision, because she has a tendency to say she wants one thing, then we give it to her, and she has a shitfit, complaining that she really wanted the other thing, and we should have known.
I believe that's all normal and part of her strong character. We'll get through it. Actually, the biggest concern I have about her right now is a school thing.
So, if you've spent any time at all with Z, you know that she lives for the company other children and thrives in their presence. So she pretty much walked into the first day of school and found the biggest, cutest girls, and announced "I'm Zadie! I'm a nice girl. Do you want to be friends? I like to play. Can I play with you? Can I sit next to you?" And because the girls have been friends for quite a while, they sort of had their own clique going. Yes; a pre-school clique. Anyway, they rejected her, which meant she tried to insert herself harder, which meant they pushed back harder, and a vicious cycle of whirlwind meanness ensued. Seriously, several of the other mothers have approached either Mom or me and expressed concern over the "girl drama" or "the situation" or just said that they feel bad for Zadie. The teachers know and are trying to intervene. The other parents are watching out. Even the girls' mothers have told the teacher that they're trying really hard to address the situation with their own daughters.
I think it's going to get better, and I think Zadie's learning to cope a little better, too. For example, she has been making friends with another little girl that gets excluded, and sometimes she even just plays with the boys. But it's hard to see those girls be mean to my kid and restrain myself from bitch-slapping them. (NB: I could probably not really bitch-slap a four year old. I am much more likely to say passive-agressive shit loud enough got their mothers to hear. "Oh, those girls don't want to include people right now, honey. Why don't you find someone who's ready to be nice?")
So anyway, that's kind of what's up right now. She loves school, she eats everything in sight, and she pretends to be Wonder Woman and Joan Jett as often as a princess, so I guess we're doing something right.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Why I am the 99%
If you've been avoiding the news, here's a quick run-down of what's been going on. People gathered in Zucotti Park in NYC in the Wall Street area, and called their movement "Occupy Wall Street." They adopted the motto "We are the 99%." This was meant to point out income inequality in the United States. (If you're interested, in terms of income equality, we come in 93rd of 134 countries studied, behind Iran and China, among others.)
There's a tumblr site named We are the 99 Percent showing people's individual stories. Although there is variety, the overwhelming majority were people who were out of work and buried in debt.
In response, a guy named Erick Ericksonn started one called "We are the 53%," and it has a singular message with some variety as well: Quit whining. What I find most interesting about the site is how many sad stories are there, too -- bankruptcies, debt, medical bills, disability, unemployment... The idea is that these people are the ones in the 53% of Americans who pay Federal taxes, but if their stories are true, many of them simply couldn't make enough money to be in that group.
So... someone created this other one called "Actually, you're the 47%." It's meant to be humorous, and it's a little cutting, but I like it. One picture that's gotten a lot of play on Facebook is a girl who worked her way through college and is broke now, but doesn't blame Wall Street for her problems. Whoever writes the tumblr wrote that (s)he wasn't sure she understood what the 99% means, and also that her "broke ass" is not in the 53%.
For reference, I also like this one: We are the one percent. If you don't follow the link, it's mostly young people who are wealthy for various reasons (most inherited money) who stand with the 99%
Which brings me to... just where the heck am I? Well, I'm really comfortable. If I had a large-ish piece of paper to hold in front of my face, it would have to include that my parents were middle class, but my mom mostly raised me as a single mom on a county worker's salary. We didn't have absolutely everything, but we had what we needed. My parents both saved for my college, and so I have no student loan debt. (I did go to a less-expensive state school.) I worked hard, but I also lucked into a lot of things. I made some good decisions with some good guidance, like saving for retirement, buying a home, and never getting into credit card debt. Now, my family and I are comfortable: if we want to take friends out to dinner, buy some designer shoes (on sale), or get an iPad, we can. We have medical, dental, vision, a new car, a medium-sized house in a safe, comfortable neighborhood, and the ability to do fun stuff periodically. I feel really comfortable, and I want for nothing.
BUT.
I don't want to be in the one percent. It's not a jealousy issue. And I'm not personally some unemployed hippie pothead. I think that anyone who has a liberal arts degree and refuses to do a job that's "beneath" them like slinging coffee is probably a whiner, too. As a household, we're exactly halfway between the poverty line and the Bush tax cut line. We're more than $200,000 away from the 1%. I certainly do pay Federal taxes, and I've really never complained about that. I use parks, roads, schools, libraries -- and if my house catches on fire, I'm calling 9-1-1. Actually, I can't help but wonder how many who identify as the 53% were also Tea Partiers. The 53% seem to be saying "I pay taxes and I'm proud of it. Keep taxing me!" Whereas the Tea Party, of course, thinks taxes are unfair and of the devil. There's a real mixed message in there somewhere.
But it doesn't really matter if you WANT to be identified with the 99% or not, because unless you make more than $350,000 a year, you ARE. And how you feel about the Puritan work ethic, college vs. trade school, how hard or how easy you've had it, and what your views are on universal health care all don't matter. Because you have very little power. And THAT'S the point of the 99%.
Who can hire lobbyists? The 1%. Who can make large donations to political campaigns? The 1%. Who can golf at the private club with their senator? The 1%. Who can now, because of the Citizens United decision, use their company's money to make ginormous political donations? The 1%. Who can decide not to take their whole income (avoiding income tax) and just be taxed at the lower capital gains rate? Not me. Who can buy a piece of art for $4,000, wait a couple years, have it appraised by their art dealer friend at $40,000, then donate it and write off the donation? Yeah, not uncle Joe who's living on disability. They have the power to create more wealth, they have the power to influence policy that helps them create more wealth, they have the power to protect their wealth better than the 99%, and let's be honest, they have the power to create the policies themselves, as your senators are largely in the 1% as well.
My political power is as follows: I have one vote. I have my senators and representatives on speed dial and I can leave them a voice mail. I can sign online petitions. I can write this blog. I can talk to others. Let me know if there's anything I missed.
And the people on the opposite side of this argument are always saying that people who work hard should be rewarded. CEO salary in the U.S. is over 300 times what the average worker's salary is. So be honest: Do you think that CEO works harder all day than the worker? 300 times harder? Does he work harder than the kids on those tumblr sites that work 70 hours a week of hard labor?
Perhaps the people occupying Wall Street (and 1,923 other cities!) would benefit from having a clearer message or a set of defined demands, but I'm happy they're there. I think it's finally time someone was getting some attention besides the kooks in tricorn hats who seem to believe that CEOs shouldn't get taxed at all.
Our level of income inequality is staggering. Unemployment is high. The "job creators" haven't. Student debt is going up as tuition goes up. Our level of economic mobility is the lowest it's been in years, and isn't that the whole American Dream? That you can become anything? That you can live a better life than your parents?
Sure, I'm personally doing fine. But that doesn't mean I can look around and say that our system is working. It isn't. I teach students living in poverty who have worked hard and gotten good grades. Many go to state schools to save money, but even they will rack up student debt. And will there be jobs available for them in four years? I tell them yes. I tell them that there are always jobs for people who work hard and really try. But I don't know if it's true.
That's why I'm the 99%. That, and the fact that I make less than $350,000 a year. Which means whether you stand with them or not, whether you affiliate with a political party or not, and whether you pay Federal taxes or not, you are probably the 99% too. Just, you know, statistically speaking.
There's a tumblr site named We are the 99 Percent showing people's individual stories. Although there is variety, the overwhelming majority were people who were out of work and buried in debt.
In response, a guy named Erick Ericksonn started one called "We are the 53%," and it has a singular message with some variety as well: Quit whining. What I find most interesting about the site is how many sad stories are there, too -- bankruptcies, debt, medical bills, disability, unemployment... The idea is that these people are the ones in the 53% of Americans who pay Federal taxes, but if their stories are true, many of them simply couldn't make enough money to be in that group.
So... someone created this other one called "Actually, you're the 47%." It's meant to be humorous, and it's a little cutting, but I like it. One picture that's gotten a lot of play on Facebook is a girl who worked her way through college and is broke now, but doesn't blame Wall Street for her problems. Whoever writes the tumblr wrote that (s)he wasn't sure she understood what the 99% means, and also that her "broke ass" is not in the 53%.
For reference, I also like this one: We are the one percent. If you don't follow the link, it's mostly young people who are wealthy for various reasons (most inherited money) who stand with the 99%
Which brings me to... just where the heck am I? Well, I'm really comfortable. If I had a large-ish piece of paper to hold in front of my face, it would have to include that my parents were middle class, but my mom mostly raised me as a single mom on a county worker's salary. We didn't have absolutely everything, but we had what we needed. My parents both saved for my college, and so I have no student loan debt. (I did go to a less-expensive state school.) I worked hard, but I also lucked into a lot of things. I made some good decisions with some good guidance, like saving for retirement, buying a home, and never getting into credit card debt. Now, my family and I are comfortable: if we want to take friends out to dinner, buy some designer shoes (on sale), or get an iPad, we can. We have medical, dental, vision, a new car, a medium-sized house in a safe, comfortable neighborhood, and the ability to do fun stuff periodically. I feel really comfortable, and I want for nothing.
BUT.
I don't want to be in the one percent. It's not a jealousy issue. And I'm not personally some unemployed hippie pothead. I think that anyone who has a liberal arts degree and refuses to do a job that's "beneath" them like slinging coffee is probably a whiner, too. As a household, we're exactly halfway between the poverty line and the Bush tax cut line. We're more than $200,000 away from the 1%. I certainly do pay Federal taxes, and I've really never complained about that. I use parks, roads, schools, libraries -- and if my house catches on fire, I'm calling 9-1-1. Actually, I can't help but wonder how many who identify as the 53% were also Tea Partiers. The 53% seem to be saying "I pay taxes and I'm proud of it. Keep taxing me!" Whereas the Tea Party, of course, thinks taxes are unfair and of the devil. There's a real mixed message in there somewhere.
But it doesn't really matter if you WANT to be identified with the 99% or not, because unless you make more than $350,000 a year, you ARE. And how you feel about the Puritan work ethic, college vs. trade school, how hard or how easy you've had it, and what your views are on universal health care all don't matter. Because you have very little power. And THAT'S the point of the 99%.
Who can hire lobbyists? The 1%. Who can make large donations to political campaigns? The 1%. Who can golf at the private club with their senator? The 1%. Who can now, because of the Citizens United decision, use their company's money to make ginormous political donations? The 1%. Who can decide not to take their whole income (avoiding income tax) and just be taxed at the lower capital gains rate? Not me. Who can buy a piece of art for $4,000, wait a couple years, have it appraised by their art dealer friend at $40,000, then donate it and write off the donation? Yeah, not uncle Joe who's living on disability. They have the power to create more wealth, they have the power to influence policy that helps them create more wealth, they have the power to protect their wealth better than the 99%, and let's be honest, they have the power to create the policies themselves, as your senators are largely in the 1% as well.
My political power is as follows: I have one vote. I have my senators and representatives on speed dial and I can leave them a voice mail. I can sign online petitions. I can write this blog. I can talk to others. Let me know if there's anything I missed.
And the people on the opposite side of this argument are always saying that people who work hard should be rewarded. CEO salary in the U.S. is over 300 times what the average worker's salary is. So be honest: Do you think that CEO works harder all day than the worker? 300 times harder? Does he work harder than the kids on those tumblr sites that work 70 hours a week of hard labor?
Perhaps the people occupying Wall Street (and 1,923 other cities!) would benefit from having a clearer message or a set of defined demands, but I'm happy they're there. I think it's finally time someone was getting some attention besides the kooks in tricorn hats who seem to believe that CEOs shouldn't get taxed at all.
Our level of income inequality is staggering. Unemployment is high. The "job creators" haven't. Student debt is going up as tuition goes up. Our level of economic mobility is the lowest it's been in years, and isn't that the whole American Dream? That you can become anything? That you can live a better life than your parents?
Sure, I'm personally doing fine. But that doesn't mean I can look around and say that our system is working. It isn't. I teach students living in poverty who have worked hard and gotten good grades. Many go to state schools to save money, but even they will rack up student debt. And will there be jobs available for them in four years? I tell them yes. I tell them that there are always jobs for people who work hard and really try. But I don't know if it's true.
That's why I'm the 99%. That, and the fact that I make less than $350,000 a year. Which means whether you stand with them or not, whether you affiliate with a political party or not, and whether you pay Federal taxes or not, you are probably the 99% too. Just, you know, statistically speaking.
Sunday, October 02, 2011
Food
I've been feeling really blessed and grateful about food lately.
On Thursday I was eating my snack at work -- Greek yogurt with jam. But it was yogurt made by hand in the kitchen of my friend Cate, and the jam was made in my own kitchen with plums I got at the farmer's market, and it was black-pepper-plum, and I thought at that moment that I am one of only a handful of people in the world who could have that exact snack, and it was an AWESOME snack.
Then yesterday, I was cleaning the refrigerator (and it's hard to feel grateful when cleaning the refrigerator). I threw away a whole garbage sack worth of things, wiped down the outsides of jars, removed and washed the shelves, and re-organized. When I was done, our fridge was still packed to the gills. There's a shelf devoted to jams, jellies, fruit butters, and pickles. We just have so much food, it's so abundant... and I recognize how lucky that is.
And then today we were grazing on a late lunch. I made guacamole, we had labneh (a strained yogurt, also made by Cate), and we also had tomatoes from the garden, a cucumber from the garden, and a purple cauliflower that had been Zadie's choice at the grocery store. We variously combined and dipped and nibbled and shared. We have heard so many people say they didn't have much luck with the tomatoes this year, but we did. And we hardly ever get many cucumbers, but for some reason this year, every time we think they're tapped out, we look under a leaf and there's a new one (the one we ate today had been completely hidden, and we found it when it was a foot long!). We had a pumpkin vine volunteer itself this season, and I thought we had only four pumpkins growing, but I just found a fifth turning yellow in the leaves.
Anyway, I do recognize how lucky we are in terms of health, safety, money, job security, family, comfort, and so much more. But this week, I find myself very grateful for my and our relationship with food.
On Thursday I was eating my snack at work -- Greek yogurt with jam. But it was yogurt made by hand in the kitchen of my friend Cate, and the jam was made in my own kitchen with plums I got at the farmer's market, and it was black-pepper-plum, and I thought at that moment that I am one of only a handful of people in the world who could have that exact snack, and it was an AWESOME snack.
Then yesterday, I was cleaning the refrigerator (and it's hard to feel grateful when cleaning the refrigerator). I threw away a whole garbage sack worth of things, wiped down the outsides of jars, removed and washed the shelves, and re-organized. When I was done, our fridge was still packed to the gills. There's a shelf devoted to jams, jellies, fruit butters, and pickles. We just have so much food, it's so abundant... and I recognize how lucky that is.
And then today we were grazing on a late lunch. I made guacamole, we had labneh (a strained yogurt, also made by Cate), and we also had tomatoes from the garden, a cucumber from the garden, and a purple cauliflower that had been Zadie's choice at the grocery store. We variously combined and dipped and nibbled and shared. We have heard so many people say they didn't have much luck with the tomatoes this year, but we did. And we hardly ever get many cucumbers, but for some reason this year, every time we think they're tapped out, we look under a leaf and there's a new one (the one we ate today had been completely hidden, and we found it when it was a foot long!). We had a pumpkin vine volunteer itself this season, and I thought we had only four pumpkins growing, but I just found a fifth turning yellow in the leaves.
Anyway, I do recognize how lucky we are in terms of health, safety, money, job security, family, comfort, and so much more. But this week, I find myself very grateful for my and our relationship with food.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)