Hot town, summer in the city

Well, not today. But it's really summertime! I've been off for a week. Can you feel me reconnecting with myself?
I always swear that I'll try to keep it brief, but I never do, do I?
So... The garden is a delight. My tomatoes are tall, and the two biggest ones turned yellow today. There are about sixty growing thus far, and they've just begun! We also have cukes, zukes (two harvested already), pumpkins, eggplant (got its first flowers yesterday), onions (harvested yesterday), mint, artichokes, peppers, blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, echinacea, chamomile, fennel, lavender, sage, and a newly planted watermelon. With the exception of a pepper I had to give up on and an artichoke that didn't get enough light, everything is thriving. The tomatoes are about up to my chin. Having a small home garden is much more enjoyable than I ever thought it would be.
I'm a little bummed that I seem to be sick a lot this Spring. I had the mastitis, a sinus infection, the flu, and now pinkeye (which is going away quickly without medication). I also have a lingering cough for some reason. I'm on the world's slowest losing-weight schedule, but I am still doing that. I'm starting to really see the results in the way my clothes fit and in the way my body looks, but I'm also not hung up on the idea, either. I've been trying to get the most out of my gym membership, so in addition to my usual routine, I have added a few yoga and Zumba classes here and there. I also changed up my usual routine just a bit, adding some more weights/machines for my upper body, and I can feel the shape of my arms changing, too. Michelle Obama arms, here I come!
Zadie and I have been very busy. At the moment, she has swimming Monday through Thursday and karate on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Add to that some socializing, some gardening, some chores, and suddenly we have a very full week! Karate is going great. I told someone yesterday that Zadie is the last one standing, last one kneeling, last one to shout "yes, sir!," and she wiggles in line. But for Zadie, the fact that she's kneeling, standing, shouting, and lining up is pretty great! (And today she actually wasn't the last one... she's improving every time.)
Swimming is not going quite so well. Suffice to say, Zadie has used up her bravery elsewhere. We're going to stick it out through next week, then maybe try something else like the Y. My dad also agreed to teach her, and thus far we haven't gone over there. She might feel more comfortable with him.
Well, I'm exhausted and heading for bed. Take care, CM

The pictures..

Zadie loved the Mission playground.



So did Reza.


Saturday at the beach. He found several whole sand dollars.

With the Sutro Baths behind us.

Heading in to the Conservatory of Flowers.

I liked this one.

Zadie liked this one because it is purple.

Sweetie liked this one because it looks like a monster face.

Their special exhibit, Plantasaurus Rex, was pretty cool.

Her appetite wasn't all the way back, but it was good enough for some ice cream.

She loved this thing. Look at the other people on it -- it's mostly teens and adults.

One more for perspective. There are other kids on it, but none as little as her.

Day three -- the sucky trip home

We got up and went to Beachside, where we had a lovely breakfast. In an odd coincidence, the proprietors of Old Soul, a Sacramento coffee roaster, were there. We thought about taking a cable car, but in the end just decided to go home, with a stop in Berkeley first.

As it was only ten, absolutely nothing in Berkeley was open. We're not sure what early risers do there. We headed back to the freeway.

Before too long, I realized my stomach was feeling pretty touchy. I was having waves of nausea, and I tried to breathe deeply to help it pass. We stopped and got a Sprite and I went to the restroom to see if I could vomit, but nothing happened.

No, it waited until I was driving in West Sacramento at the interchange of about three freeways. Naturally, I couldn't pull over, so I just kept driving and hurling. Sweetie tried hard to catch it in my McDonald's cup, but it was much, much worse than the wee cup could hold. I actually called Kaiser later, and they asked how many times I vomited, and I had to answer, "Well once, basically -- it just went on for several minutes."

We finally got home, I stripped my clothes off in the garage, left the car in the driveway with the windows open, and then I spent the next seven or so hours lying down, then slowly sitting up, then lying down again. And sipping water. I felt like SHIT. I'm actually starting to feel a little better, because I took some Tylenol for my headache, and the headache had really been the icing on the shit cake.

But enough of that. I'm going to leave the sick talk as its own post and start a new one just for photos of us having a great time in San Francisco, because we really, truly did.

Day two

I really got some great pictures today, but I'm having trouble syncing them, so some brief verbiage, and a longer post later.
We wake up too early for most cafes nearby, so we found the sole open one, Java Beach, and went in, it was fine,but nothing to write home about. Zadie's appetite was still a little off (and we had one midnight vomit episode), so she picked at a bit of bagel and then a bit of croissant and was done.
Then we went for a walk on the beach. I'm not sure exactly why (although my guess is that we went overboard on the ocean safety talks), but Z is now scared of the ocean and repulsed by seas foam. She refused to walk near the tide at all, so it was kind of a rough walk, as the adults both wanted to enjoy the waves and cool washed-in things (including whole sand dollars and jellyfish!). At one point, we had walked so far we were almost to Cliff House, so we just went up there. It was too early to see the camera obscura, but there were lovely views. I would have liked to walk down to the sutro baths, but I had to pee like crazy, and there were no restrooms anywhere. We walked instead through Sutro park, then a neighborhood, then through Golden Gate park towards the hotel. That was where the day took a bit of a downhill turn. I don't know whether it was remnants of illness, a side stitch, or just general crankiness, but Zadie just did not want to walk. She's already stubborn as a mule, so getting her to walk another mile when she didn't want to was just torturous. (I know we sound like slave drivers, but she loves to walk and can usually walk miles without complaint. It didn't even occur to us that the walk was too far.)
When we got back to the hotel, she was happy to rest and watch Mr. Rogers, but we had no plans to do that all day. I had seen signs for a park shuttle, so I looked it up and found that it was free, came every 15 minutes, and went everywhere we wanted. We walked to the shuttle stop (2 complaint-ridden blocks), then stopped at the Murphy windmill to wait. The ride was great: we were the only ones on almost the whole way, we saw waterfalls, the bison paddock, lakes... Our first stop was the Conservatory of Flowers, which I thoug I'd been to, but I was wrong. I've been to the botanical gardens. The conservatory is a big glass building with microclimates inside that showcases all kinds of different plants. Some were incredibly beautiful. Their special exhibit was on plants from the Paleolithic era, and Zadie loved that display, which featured a simulated volcanic eruption.
Next, we went to the area where the DeYoung and the Academy of Sciences is, because we had seen several food trucks parked there. We got Indian, and it was as good as any I've ever had in a restaurant, particularly the succulent pakoras. Zadie nibbled a bit of rice.
She said she really just wanted to see the fountain, so I went to throw away our trash and Sweetie walked her down the steps. It took me about twenty seconds, and before I had made my way back to them, she was crying piteously. She had tripped and had a skinned knee and scraped up arm. We gave her band aids and cool water and gum and sang "Everybody Hurts," but nothing improved her mood, and she burst into tears periodically for at least half an hour (the REM actually made it worse).
We went next on the shuttle to the children's playground, which is great fun. It has a huge rope climbing structure and a concrete slide that you go down on a piece of cardboard. Zadie started to show a bit of her usual fearless nature, and when some other parents told her she was a good climber, she said, "I know!" For the record, she was probably the smallest kid on the rope thing the whole time we were there, and she was a badass about getting around on it.
Then we got an ice cream and went on the carousel, and finally back to the shuttle stop to head to the hotel. We accidentally got off at the wrong windmill and had a long walk home, which caused Z to be none too pleased. But we went out again for dinner next to the hotel (Beachside, this time), and we got treats. She pecked at macaroni and some fries, complained that Sweetie's fish tasted like pee and shark, and then perked up at her first cotton candy.
We decided to take another beach stroll, but she could not be convinced. In fact, she was such a pill that we just came back to the hotel and instituted a quiet reading hour. Now everyone but me (and the incredibly loud barking dog next door) is asleep, and I'm turnng in, too.
It has been an odd trip. Zadie declared today the happiest day ever, then thirty minutes later, she said it was the worst day ever. I am sure she was still feeling sick, because she never loses her appetite. On the other hand, it was the most beautiful day, we got to do things we never have, the shuttle was really convenient (and the drivers friendly and blasting the classic rock), and in many ways the day was actually much more kid-focused than some of our outings. I finally saw the bison! And when I'm on a real keyboard, I'll give a few more details (and the pictures), but suffice to say, it was a good day in many ways. Still, I think I'll be ready to go home tomorrow. Well, assuming the car doesn't stink too badly of vomit.

San Francisco day 1: craziness!

Since I'm out of school and it's Father's Day, we decided to go to San Francisco. We spent the early morning having breakfast, cleaning, and getting some laundry done, then about ten, we hit the road. Zadie, true to form, had two breakfasts-- toast and jam, and cereal with milk. The first thing we did in the city was check out Triple Aught Designs in the Dog Patch area. We poked around for a long time before we found a suitable Dad's day gift. Then it was one, and we were hungry, so we stopped into the first decent- looking place we saw. On the way theere, Z grabbed her stomach and announced that it hurt because we hadnt fed her. The restaurant, Just For You cafe and bakery, ended up being quite charming and tasty. There were both cornmeal pancakes and Mickey Mouse pancakes on the menu, and Z couldn't decide, so the waitress helpfully offered a hybrid. Zadie went to the bathroom three times, but nothing much happened. She only ate one pancake ear before insisting she was done. We hopped back in the car for our next stop, the Mission. We took a couple wrong turns, and traffic was heavy, but it didn't take us too long. We were already on Valencia when we heard two noteworthy gas-passing episodes, then a quite unusual noise that had us asking, "was that from your mouth? Seriously, where did that sound come from?" And then we heard the fountain of puke start. Luckily, I was a few seconds from a parking spot, so we moved her to the trunk, wiped her down, changed her clothes, gave her some water, and then Sweetie took her to a park for a few minutes while I used several hundred baby wipes to try to address the car interior. She actually said she felt much better, so we walked down the street, mostly without difficulty, although she did stop numerous times to hover over a gutter or planter to mime puking again. She was a little slow and grumpy, though, so I took her to get her first ginger ale while Sweetie did some shopping. Then he took her into the park again while I peeked into a few shops. It was a great park, and she was having a delightful time, including on some spinning, sick-making things, so we figured she was okay. We checked into our hotel, then we wandered to the Haight for some more browsing. We never found anything that looked too appealing to eat, so we went back to the hotel (in the Outer Sunset) again. I had read good Yelp reviews of a place just a few blocks away, so we walked there, but there was a long wait, so we went into a Mexican place next door instead. It was fine, although Z did not eat a single bite of enchilada (and trust me, it is not like her to miss a meal). Her energy and attitude are good, so we're hoping for a fun day tomorrow exploring Golden Gate Park. Cross your fingers for no more vomit! And that we find some Febreze or something for the car.

Timing!

So, I mostly just brag about how awesome my kid is, and she totally is. But there's no doubt that there are a few things about her that are different than other kids, and different in a way that are likely to cause her some problems. She's exceptionally high-energy. She is very physical (she'd much rather have a "love-attack" than a hug). She is kinetic -- she never stops moving until she falls asleep at night (and frankly, sometimes it's hard for her to fall asleep because she's moving so much). And while those things are great in some ways -- I can't imagine her ever having a weight problem -- they do make sitting quietly in circle time a bit of a challenge.

We tried Daddy and Me soccer. She sprinted at every opportunity from the field and towards the edge of the park. She really never got the concept of the games and just preferred to run at full speed, leaving her ball behind. We tried it for, I think, three six-week sessions, and then we gave up.

I took her to a ballet class at a nearby community center, but it was quickly apparent that wasn't going to work. The teacher would demonstrate fifth position, then walk around to each child to check and give corrections while the others waited. Zadie would wait for a short while, then run to the front of the room to hang from the barre and ham it up in the mirror.

When another year had passed, I signed her up for ballet again (at her request) at a different studio. This, I thought, would work better. The teacher kept the class moving quickly, Zadie was older... But it was still only a very moderate success. At the dress rehearsal for the recital, she nearly dove off the stage (literally -- several moms jumped forward to catch her) because she was less interested in doing the dance than in exploring and jumping.

At that recital, though, was a hip-hop group for 3 and 4 year olds. They were moving vigorously, jumping, etc. I asked Zadie if she'd like to try it, and she said yes. Well, we did it for about three months, but last week when I picked her up, Mom said that not only was Zadie running around, not doing the routines, etc. (she'd had a few time-outs before actually getting kicked out of the class for the day), she was disrupting the other kids and interfering with the teacher's ability to teach.

I'm not unrealistic. I know who my kid is, and I don't expect her to be perfect. If she had simply enjoyed it, even if she wasn't exactly on point with the routines, I would have kept her in there. But if she's disrupting the class and the other students, that's another matter. I knew it was time to take her out of hip-hop.

Through pre-school, the kids had all taken a single karate class, and then the instructor had offered a free month's classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays after the initial class. Mom had been taking her, and it sounded like she was enjoying them. I actually liked what I was hearing from the class, that there was a focus on self-discipline, and Zadie was really taking that in. The free month was ending, and we were debating switching times and paying for it. It costs more than the other activities we'd had her in. But Mom was willing to pay for a month to see how it went, and she and the instructor talked -- he wasn't 100% sure Zadie was ready for it, either, so they agreed that she didn't have to buy the outfit or anything yet, and they would decide at the end of the month whether she was ready.

Tuesday was the new class at the later time, so Mom had told me she would just bring Zadie home. That gave me a little more free time than I usually have, so I went by the dance studio to withdraw her. The guy at the counter had me sign some papers, and I walked out. Then another woman came out the door, calling me as I walked away. She tried to convince me to stay -- I had already paid for the rest of the month, I had bought the costume -- so I had to voice what was wrong. My kid, beautiful and smart and strong and loving and creative as she is, is also kind of hyperactive, and she has trouble listening, and she was disrupting the whole class. When I walked back towards the car, I surprised myself by saying out loud, "I'm sad."

I was, too. I didn't want her to have challenges like this. We had now gone through quite the series of classes that she wasn't well-suited to. I didn't care if she was the uncoordinated chubby girl in the ballet class (there's always one) as long as there was something she enjoyed and tried hard at. I don't expect her to be an Olympian, just to get some exercise and have some fun, not constantly get in trouble. Why would I pay $70 a month to have her put in time-out?

I went home still feeling really blue. I talked a little to Sweetie about it, but I had barely been home five minutes when Mom came over with Zadie. "We had a great day at karate! She did very well. Zadie, show them your Tiger roll."

And my daughter stood with a strong posture and a focused look in her eye, executing a series of moves and saying the instructions at the same time. "Attention stance! Thumbs on top! Catch! Triangle on the floor! Isa!" She stood, moved her arms into place sharply, did a perfect roll, and stood at the end and finished.

Karate it is.

I don't care if she never gets a black belt. I don't care if she decides to quit and take up the oboe. I just want her to find something to do that she's crazy about -- crazy enough to be a little less crazy for a half-hour twice a week. I liked the focus I saw on her face. I liked the control she had over her body. I hope she liked the feeling, too.

(Un-edited because I'm currently being used as a jungle gym.)