"She's autistic."

...Is something I almost never say. I mean, I'm not ashamed of it, and I don't mind talking about it, but on the other hand, it's not anyone's business, particularly, outside of our loved ones and her teachers.

If I'm singing along with Billy Joel in Trader Joe's, no-one needs to know my whole back story. They can either figure it out (my story is I have completely undiscriminating tastes in music and no shame) or ignore it. Same when my kid is making weird noises or screeching "WHAT'S MAKING THAT SOUND?!" You either have enough experience with autistic kids that you already know, or you think she's ill-behaved and you're judging me and I don't give a single fuck.

But I did say it today. It felt very unfamiliar to do so.

I took the kids to the child care center at the gym. I initially thought I might just work out, but I saw that a yoga class was starting, so I went back to the child care center to tell them where I'd be in case they needed me. (This is a very minor lie -- I was also checking up on the kids, but whatever.)

The woman in charge said they were both fine, and "Your daughter is so funny! She was like, 'I don't usually like humans, but I don't mind spending time with babies, I guess.'"

It paused on my tongue for just a second, but in that second I decided that my kid saying she doesn't like humans might, in fact, be worth an explanation, especially to someone providing her care. It would help make sense of her, a little.

I know it helped us make sense of her, a little.