Well, I know most people don't have a good relationship with their dentists, but I've had the same one my entire life. Before I even had teeth, he used to ride me up and down in the chair and give me a toy. And for the last 20 years, he's had an RDA named Bernadette. With rare exception, Bernadette is the one who has seen me first, done my cleaning, my flouride... I spend more time with her than with my dentist. I have been hearing about her son since he was tiny and he graduated from high school last year. Well, she's leaving!! She's going to work for the state! It's a good move for her, since my dentist will someday retire (although my mind is totally having a temper tantrum in trying to ignore this eventuality) and he owns the practice, so it'll close then. Anyway, she'll have good pay and benefits, and she isn't planning to retire for another 20 years or so. So I'm happy for her, but seriously! I'll have to get to know a new assistant? That's just crazy. I want Bernadette.
On a totally unrelated note, I was watching the Style network, and there was a woman getting a makeover who was a tall, pale, freckly, geeky redhead. She totally reminded me of a girl I knew from junior high and then reconnected with briefly in college. She was an unrepentant nerd. I mean, came to school dressed as a unicorn (in a white unitard) on Halloween. Pretty "Welcome to the Dollhouse." Anyway, having been reminded of her, I decided to Google her, and it's ALL about her graduate studies in math, work at NASA, fuel cell technology stuff... How fucking cool is that? Yay nerds.
Monday, February 19, 2007
Why I don't ride the bus.
Okay, I realize that my carbon footprint is smaller than many people's. I recycle, use canvas bags, conserve energy and water, buy locally grown organic foods, do as little driving as I can... But I was reading Uneasy Rhetoric, and I always feel guilty for not riding the bus. Because I am basically one of those people who could practically get on a bus outside my front door and have it drop me off at work. So why don't I ride?
1: First, it's not exactly by my front door -- I would have to walk about 7 blocks to the light rail station and then 7 blocks home. Not awful, but it does add to the time involved in my commute.
2: Speaking of time, it takes just over 15 minutes for me to get to work right now in the car. The shortest time that light rail would take is 25 minutes, and that doesn't include the walk.
3: It would cost $4 per day to ride. That's $80 a month, or $85 for the convenience of the monthly pass, which means not having to carry around a wad of dollar bills every day. (Incidentally, aren't monthy passes supposed to save you money?) Compare this to the car: it's about 340 miles of driving each month, which is just over a tank of gas for me (approximately $30). Even if you add in the insurance, that's still only equivalent to the amount I'd be paying for mass transit. And I'd STILL have to pay the insurance, because I drive other places besides work. No matter how you figure it, mass transit costs more than driving.
4: Mass transit eliminates my ability to carry stuff to work, which I do a lot. Hey, I teach drama -- it's not unusual for me to be lugging a crate of fabric, a couple gallons of paint, and some lumber.
5: Mass transit severely restricts my ability to go other places after work, which in recent months have included the grocery store, places to pick up dinner, the post office, doctor's appointments, etc. Say I needed to go to the ultrasound I had recently -- it would have added about half an hour of travel time (which would have made me miss the appointment).
Are these surmountable? Sure. I could suck it up and pay more. I could plan ahead for appointments and hauling stuff and drive on those days. I could get up earlier and leave the house earlier. I could get home later and prepare dinner later (although Sweetie would probably object, since he's usually starving by the time I get dinner on the table as it is). But with all these things added together, it just doesn't really make sense to me. There's no appeal. Extra time to read on the train? Sure, but offset by the fact that I'd be surrounded by strangers, and let's be honest -- the second half of my commute would be on the Meadowview bound train through the worst part of South Sac. Not exactly a conducive atmosphere for quiet reading time. Anyway, I just wanted to throw in my two cents on why, inveterate hippie tree-hugger that I am, I will not be giving up my car and utilizing our public transit system.
1: First, it's not exactly by my front door -- I would have to walk about 7 blocks to the light rail station and then 7 blocks home. Not awful, but it does add to the time involved in my commute.
2: Speaking of time, it takes just over 15 minutes for me to get to work right now in the car. The shortest time that light rail would take is 25 minutes, and that doesn't include the walk.
3: It would cost $4 per day to ride. That's $80 a month, or $85 for the convenience of the monthly pass, which means not having to carry around a wad of dollar bills every day. (Incidentally, aren't monthy passes supposed to save you money?) Compare this to the car: it's about 340 miles of driving each month, which is just over a tank of gas for me (approximately $30). Even if you add in the insurance, that's still only equivalent to the amount I'd be paying for mass transit. And I'd STILL have to pay the insurance, because I drive other places besides work. No matter how you figure it, mass transit costs more than driving.
4: Mass transit eliminates my ability to carry stuff to work, which I do a lot. Hey, I teach drama -- it's not unusual for me to be lugging a crate of fabric, a couple gallons of paint, and some lumber.
5: Mass transit severely restricts my ability to go other places after work, which in recent months have included the grocery store, places to pick up dinner, the post office, doctor's appointments, etc. Say I needed to go to the ultrasound I had recently -- it would have added about half an hour of travel time (which would have made me miss the appointment).
Are these surmountable? Sure. I could suck it up and pay more. I could plan ahead for appointments and hauling stuff and drive on those days. I could get up earlier and leave the house earlier. I could get home later and prepare dinner later (although Sweetie would probably object, since he's usually starving by the time I get dinner on the table as it is). But with all these things added together, it just doesn't really make sense to me. There's no appeal. Extra time to read on the train? Sure, but offset by the fact that I'd be surrounded by strangers, and let's be honest -- the second half of my commute would be on the Meadowview bound train through the worst part of South Sac. Not exactly a conducive atmosphere for quiet reading time. Anyway, I just wanted to throw in my two cents on why, inveterate hippie tree-hugger that I am, I will not be giving up my car and utilizing our public transit system.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Here's the asterisk from the last post
This is my funny shirt. Just in case you can't read it, the bunny on the left has a bite mark out of his bootie, and he's saying "My butt hurts." The other bunny has a bite out of his ears, and he replies "What?"
I would take a more flattering photo, but I am far too lazy.
I would take a more flattering photo, but I am far too lazy.
Sunday
I had breakfast with Monkeygirl, which is always fun. Then I went to yoga. I came home and enjoyed the sunshine by sitting in the hammock to read the newspaper. Then I went to a movie with Mom.
We saw "Music and Lyrics," and I enjoyed it. Now listen, I realize I'm not as discriminating as most of my classay friends; I genuinely enjoy most of the movies I watch intentionally. And I realize that I'm predisposed to like movies with Drew Barrymore, movies with Hugh Grant, and romantic comedies that seem sincere and have chemistry. (I do not, however, like Meg Ryan movies, or almost any romantic comedies that seem contrived, so I don't go see them.) Anyway, I thought it was fun -- at first I was ooked out that Hugh Grant was so much older than Drew Barrymore, but their chemistry and charm on screen sort of mitigated that. Also, there was a great parody of 80s videos, a couple good parodies of modern videos and pop music, and some very funny lines ("Although she thought the Dalai Lama was, improbably, an actual llama..."). And although the movie itself was kind of predictable, individual scenes and characters rarely were. Mom and I both agreed in one scene that Hugh Grant was going to punch a guy, but it didn't go like that.
Then we had a nice dinner at Paesano's, then stopped by Tres Hermanas hoping for albondigas for Sweetie, but alas, it was chicken rice. I then went to Trader Joe's to get a few things. Sigh. I know I should not go there on Sunday nights. I walk up to the store and notice a really beautiful woman in line. Then I go in, pick up half and half, cream cheese, a couple frozen lunches, some fizzy water, then head to the checkout area, where I throw in some gum and several bags of dried fruit thingies. I pick the line that has one cart in front of me, most of which is already unloaded. All I can see that's left is a young girl in a tutu and furry pink jacket holding a balloon (by the way, if I could get away with this outfit, I TOTALLY would). But apparently there were a few more things in there, because the checker was still ringing the mom up. I look around and notice someone is staring at me -- it's the beautiful woman. She's reading my shirt (which is freaking hilarious, by the way*), and I laugh with her. I figure she must have been in line, but left to get something else and came back. Well, it's taking a very long time in my line, and now everything in the beautiful woman's basket is out, so I think, "hey, I'll go in that line." I go over there. But although the basket is unloaded, apparently she is opening her OWN store, because they have five-thousand things to bag, and the checker there isn't in any hurry. I go BACK to the first line, where the woman and the kid have left to go to the bathroom, but the checker is STILL bagging their stuff. Eventually, I finally get rung up. I should just know better than to go grocery shopping on Sunday evening.
We saw "Music and Lyrics," and I enjoyed it. Now listen, I realize I'm not as discriminating as most of my classay friends; I genuinely enjoy most of the movies I watch intentionally. And I realize that I'm predisposed to like movies with Drew Barrymore, movies with Hugh Grant, and romantic comedies that seem sincere and have chemistry. (I do not, however, like Meg Ryan movies, or almost any romantic comedies that seem contrived, so I don't go see them.) Anyway, I thought it was fun -- at first I was ooked out that Hugh Grant was so much older than Drew Barrymore, but their chemistry and charm on screen sort of mitigated that. Also, there was a great parody of 80s videos, a couple good parodies of modern videos and pop music, and some very funny lines ("Although she thought the Dalai Lama was, improbably, an actual llama..."). And although the movie itself was kind of predictable, individual scenes and characters rarely were. Mom and I both agreed in one scene that Hugh Grant was going to punch a guy, but it didn't go like that.
Then we had a nice dinner at Paesano's, then stopped by Tres Hermanas hoping for albondigas for Sweetie, but alas, it was chicken rice. I then went to Trader Joe's to get a few things. Sigh. I know I should not go there on Sunday nights. I walk up to the store and notice a really beautiful woman in line. Then I go in, pick up half and half, cream cheese, a couple frozen lunches, some fizzy water, then head to the checkout area, where I throw in some gum and several bags of dried fruit thingies. I pick the line that has one cart in front of me, most of which is already unloaded. All I can see that's left is a young girl in a tutu and furry pink jacket holding a balloon (by the way, if I could get away with this outfit, I TOTALLY would). But apparently there were a few more things in there, because the checker was still ringing the mom up. I look around and notice someone is staring at me -- it's the beautiful woman. She's reading my shirt (which is freaking hilarious, by the way*), and I laugh with her. I figure she must have been in line, but left to get something else and came back. Well, it's taking a very long time in my line, and now everything in the beautiful woman's basket is out, so I think, "hey, I'll go in that line." I go over there. But although the basket is unloaded, apparently she is opening her OWN store, because they have five-thousand things to bag, and the checker there isn't in any hurry. I go BACK to the first line, where the woman and the kid have left to go to the bathroom, but the checker is STILL bagging their stuff. Eventually, I finally get rung up. I should just know better than to go grocery shopping on Sunday evening.
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Lucky me
Hey all! I was cleaning this morning and my dad drove up. He was feeling lame that he had forgotten to give me a birthday present (although, to be totally honest, I never even noticed), so he gave me $200!!
I was going to go to school to pick up my book, then to ballet, then fax some stuff to the refinancing guy, then maybe go to the garden store if I had time. Well, everything this morning took longer than I thought, so I was going to be late to ballet, so I went to the garden store first. I needed a pot for my orchid. But lo and behold, what did I find there? The coolest-ass piece of garden statuary I have ever seen. There was also a Mad Hatter, and he was cheaper, but he was also pretty banged up. I got my pot and I just couldn't resist -- the caterpillar is mine!! I don't know if that little corner by the hammock will be his permanent home, but it is for now -- that thing is HEAVY!
Now I have to go to the gym.
Bye!
I was going to go to school to pick up my book, then to ballet, then fax some stuff to the refinancing guy, then maybe go to the garden store if I had time. Well, everything this morning took longer than I thought, so I was going to be late to ballet, so I went to the garden store first. I needed a pot for my orchid. But lo and behold, what did I find there? The coolest-ass piece of garden statuary I have ever seen. There was also a Mad Hatter, and he was cheaper, but he was also pretty banged up. I got my pot and I just couldn't resist -- the caterpillar is mine!! I don't know if that little corner by the hammock will be his permanent home, but it is for now -- that thing is HEAVY!
Now I have to go to the gym.
Bye!
Friday, February 16, 2007
Uh, just BSing
Well, I haven't posted much lately, so I'm just filling in space. Thursday was a sucky day at work. We had our Poetry Out Loud finals, and last year the whole PoL thing went great! There were about 20 people that competed, we ran overtime, the people from the Arts Council brought a computer, judging forms, etc. This year we had three people compete. Three. It was kind of sad. I told sweetie "I feel like I busted my ass for nothing" and he said "you did."
Today was better, although I've kind of been enjoying not teaching 2nd period and the student teacher had to go to the Bay area because her brother is very sick.
We had a nice dinner tonight and now I'm just relaxing and catching up on the reading I've missed. I should go to the gym, but I'm lazy. I plan to go to ballet tomorrow.
The weather here has been gorgeous, although we need rain. Sweetie has to work this weekend, so I'll clean and listen to the Beatles loud.
Oh, by the way, I've figured out how to become a huge wealthy pop star. I'm going to take an old pop song (I'm thinking "Cars that go boom"), keep everything but the lyrics, and add my own insipid lyrics. There will be a catchy part where I spell something out, and if I can get my hands on a washed-up rapper, I'm in like Flynn. I can sing about nearly anything -- this one came to me as I got dressed this morning:
I like them panties panties,
I like them off of you
I like them panties panties
I like them red and blue
P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSSS
(backup singers) P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSS
P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSSS
Hey, it works for Fergie from the Black-Eyed Peas.
Today was better, although I've kind of been enjoying not teaching 2nd period and the student teacher had to go to the Bay area because her brother is very sick.
We had a nice dinner tonight and now I'm just relaxing and catching up on the reading I've missed. I should go to the gym, but I'm lazy. I plan to go to ballet tomorrow.
The weather here has been gorgeous, although we need rain. Sweetie has to work this weekend, so I'll clean and listen to the Beatles loud.
Oh, by the way, I've figured out how to become a huge wealthy pop star. I'm going to take an old pop song (I'm thinking "Cars that go boom"), keep everything but the lyrics, and add my own insipid lyrics. There will be a catchy part where I spell something out, and if I can get my hands on a washed-up rapper, I'm in like Flynn. I can sing about nearly anything -- this one came to me as I got dressed this morning:
I like them panties panties,
I like them off of you
I like them panties panties
I like them red and blue
P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSSS
(backup singers) P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSS
P to the A to the N T I E ESSSSSS
Hey, it works for Fergie from the Black-Eyed Peas.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Valentine's day ups and downs
Well, I'll start with the good -- I had a scone for breakfast (mmm), got to spend some time with my sweetie, made waffles for dinner, went to ballet, got a very sweet handmade card and two books (!) for V-day from sweetie and a nice card and two pairs of purple socks (I wear a LOT of purple) from Mom and Boompah.
The bad was that I'm crazy busy at work, I had to report my first apparent homicidal plot (for reals), forgot my lunch and had to eat vending machine trail mix, had to give out the (very bad) grades in 6th period for the honors kids, got a new student who had a "personality conflict" with his last English teacher, discovered that there's a rumor that the honors kids only have to do ONE big paper instead of two (which is patently wrong), was confronted by a student trying to convince me he deserved a better grade (we went back and forth for about 20 minutes, but I wasn't budging), and was confronted by two students who wanted to know who had ratted out the alleged murder-plotter.
Yeah, so pretty sucky, despite my festive red heart socks. I'm chilling out now with a glass of port. I'm glad that my home life, which is pretty much always happy, is the last half of the day so I can recover from the first.
The bad was that I'm crazy busy at work, I had to report my first apparent homicidal plot (for reals), forgot my lunch and had to eat vending machine trail mix, had to give out the (very bad) grades in 6th period for the honors kids, got a new student who had a "personality conflict" with his last English teacher, discovered that there's a rumor that the honors kids only have to do ONE big paper instead of two (which is patently wrong), was confronted by a student trying to convince me he deserved a better grade (we went back and forth for about 20 minutes, but I wasn't budging), and was confronted by two students who wanted to know who had ratted out the alleged murder-plotter.
Yeah, so pretty sucky, despite my festive red heart socks. I'm chilling out now with a glass of port. I'm glad that my home life, which is pretty much always happy, is the last half of the day so I can recover from the first.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Synchronicity
This weekend was filled with synchronicity. I mean, little things, like that Roxanne's and my husband both eat the same thing for breakfast every day (lots of people do that) to us both having parents with multiple prisms hanging in their windows to both reaching into our purses to pull out the exact same pen to sign a receipt (and not a Bic, either, a Cross pen -- the very same one).
Today I spoke with Chris on the phone and apologized for missing him for the rest of the conference. I said we'd waited for him before the dinner Saturday night. He had waited for us, too -- in the same spot! Somehow we just missed each other. I said "well, we didn't end up eating there anyway; we went to Thai." So did he. At a place a block away from where we ate (we went to Million Elephants and he went to Thaiphoon, which we passed. He said he went home early on Sunday, and I said we had, too, that we had gone to Starbucks, but finding it closed, went back to the Radisson. He said "Wait, the international cafe thing in the Radisson?" "Yeah." "I ate there, too." I have no idea how we kept missing each other.
Today I spoke with Chris on the phone and apologized for missing him for the rest of the conference. I said we'd waited for him before the dinner Saturday night. He had waited for us, too -- in the same spot! Somehow we just missed each other. I said "well, we didn't end up eating there anyway; we went to Thai." So did he. At a place a block away from where we ate (we went to Million Elephants and he went to Thaiphoon, which we passed. He said he went home early on Sunday, and I said we had, too, that we had gone to Starbucks, but finding it closed, went back to the Radisson. He said "Wait, the international cafe thing in the Radisson?" "Yeah." "I ate there, too." I have no idea how we kept missing each other.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Long weekend
Hi all,
I'll try to sum up and only put in the interesting bits. Thursday night I went and met ballet friend for a glass of wine. She had said 58 degrees, right by Aioili Bodega Espanol. Okay, I said, then went home and thought "oh crap, 55 degrees is not anywhere near Aioili!" So I drove around and saw the tiny wine bar that Monkeygirl and I had spotted last weekend that didn't have a sign, but was clearly a wine bar and about 2 blocks away from Aioili. I parked (got a good spot and did a great parallel parking job) and walked in. I said "I'm sorry, but can you tell me the name of this establishment?" He said it's called The Grand (which is purposely ironic, as its original purpose was as a parking garage ticket payment area, and it has exactly four little tables). I tell him the 55 degrees/Aioili story, and he says he knows what place she means, but he's not going to tell me, because I should stay there. I say that I have to at least check the other place, so he tells me where it is, and it's fifty-EIGHT degrees (did you already catch that?). I walk over, and it's really crowded, so I call LisaAnne and walk back, telling her to meet me at the Grand. We have a nice time, laugh our asses off, and she tells me she's been doing a very complicated and Catholic series of prayers for me for my baby-makin' issues, which I think is very touching and couldn't hurt. A guy walks in and sits next to us -- he clearly knows the manager, and as we're laughing and talking, he introduces himself. I think he says "Hamid" or "Habib," but I can't tell, so I ask him to clarify, and somehow he gleans that I have a connection to one of those names. He says "Oh, you know a Hamid? Tell him GHstosch hscekocken." "Well," I reply, "that won't really do any good, because I won't be able to repeat it, and if I could, he wouldn't be able to understand it. But what's it mean?" He says "It means, it means... Um, steer, ram, sheep, GOAT! Goat!" "Oh!" I nod, "goat!" He continues "um, posite, pozit, opo, paralyze." Hmm, I think. "Goat paralyze." I'm not sure I've got it. He continues for a while, and finally LisaAnne gets that he's saying "The opposite of paradise." Which is hell. So I've now been told to tell my husband "Goat hell." Which I'm not sure is very nice. I smile, and go back to my conversation. When the bill comes, it arrives with a uniball pen with red electrical tape wrapped around it. Abi (for that is his name) gets very excited, saying that it is HIS pen; he left it here the other day. It's exciting, but they can keep it of course, they can keep it. It doesn't matter. So I dig in my purse for a decent pen (I have about 20 in there) and get one out, then take Abi's pen and put it in my purse and put my pen on the table. This cracks LisaAnne and Abi up, and then LisaAnne digs a huge felt-tipped permanent marker out of her purse, steals mine, and puts the marker on the table. Then we leave, still laughing.
In the morning, I picked up Roxanne. (I usually try to disguise names, but how fucking cool is that?) We make the long drive to Fresno and arrive at about 10:40. We both thought the first "session" started at 10:45, so we're just in time. But no, there was a breakfast (where author Firoozeh Dumas, whose book I just read and enjoyed, spoke), then the first session started at ten, so we were quite late. We decided to go to a poetry reading that started at 10:50, and enjoyed that. Then there was a lunch with really atrocious pasta (how do you make pasta taste like fish?), several awards given out (and they seemed peevish that we were all eating during the awards, but they had scheduled it that way), then a poet read for a rather long time. I liked her pretty well, but my companions didn't so much.
That afternoon, there were two more sessions, then a wee break (which I spent trying to get on the internet via CityofFresnoFreeWiFIProject), then the Armenian dinner. We checked into the Super8 (the lobby smelled like curry and Lysol) and put our stuff in our room (which smelled only slightly of rancid oil and had a cool pleather back-of-a-Chevy-van-style bench). We got cleaned up a bit and went to the meeting place for the Armenian dinner. Well. First of all, I've had better food. There was no veggie option, so I gave my big-ass kabob to my pal Chris and ate the rice and green beans. There were a few snacky raw veggies and cheese and pita kind of things, and I ate those. The description of the event said "Traditional Armenian dinner, then dancing." It said something about teaching us the steps, and I thought that would be fun. What they left out (wisely), was that between dinner and dancing was a LONG-ASS lecture about Saroyan. Saroyan is a writer from Fresno, but when I say it, I always think of Star Trek. "Bones, Saroyan has already beamed to the surface." "Number one, we must find out what the Saroyan people's culture was like before the war." Saroyan. Saroyan. There's a big bronze bust of him outside the convention center, and he has the haunted, sunken eyes of Einstein, the hair of Ben Franklin, and the moustache of Sam Elliot. Well, this fucking Saroyan lecture was the most boring thing I've sat through in a LONG time. Other tables are quietly chatting, we're all pantomiming various methods of suicide -- Roxanne gets up to go to the bathroom and comes back and says "Gawd, I thought when I came back maybe he'd be done, but when I walked in he was saying 'Fast forward to 1973.'" I shift in my chair and notice a little noise. I decide to milk it. I get Chris and Roxanne's attention and I go "wait for it," then move my leg to make a fart noise. Now, I thought it was obvious that it was fake, but apparently it wasn't, because there was this very real mixture of shock, disbelief, and laughter kind of all mixed up on their faces. I thought that was so hilarious that I did it again, bigger. They soon figured the chair trick out, but not before our entire table was dying of laughter and getting dirty looks. I don't care -- people all over the room were getting up and walking out in droves. We got up and left, too. We sat in the Radisson lobby and talked for a while, then all went to our various hotels. Roxanne and I stayed up REALLY late talking. While she was in the shower, I attempted to get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject.
In the morning, we went walking to get breakfast. I had read in my complimentary copy of "Destination Fresno" that there were several coffee shops around the corner on Tulare. Well, one was vacant and two others were closed. We walked back and had breakfast in the Radisson. I had been trying to only go to sessions that I really thought I might use or could share the information with others, but this morning there was a session on dance, and how to incorporate teaching dance into English and history, getting kids to learn the Charleston at the same time you taught Gatsby... well, I was really up for a fun session, so I went to that. I'd have liked to get a little more interactive (although I did swing with the instructor) and I feel a little pissy that to get the lesson plans, I had to pay $10, but I had fun. Then one more session, then another crappy lunch -- stuffed tomatoes, and it is NOT tomato season. I tried to eat the custard tart thing that was dessert, and I seriously thought it had sat out so long it had gone bad -- it was strangely bubbly and tasted of alcohol. NASTY. Then Roxanne and I and a girl that was seated at my table skipped out early (before the long reading started again) and went to Starbucks. I got my first decent coffee and we got some chill time. The place was crawling with teachers! I was able to briefly get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject, but couldn't seem to use email, although I could use my webmail.
After lunch I went to two really worthwhile sessions. I find that the ones that try to teach you how to motivate high school students are really gimmicky and not worthwhile, so I went to two university level ones. Not only did I get stuff I can actually use in my classroom, I had a really good time. It may sound stupid, but you know when you're really good at something, how it feels good to do it? Well, in both classes, we were asked to analyze literature, discuss it, and provide evidence. And that's the kind of thing I'm REALLY good at. I had forgotten how much I liked it, and in a way, how much I miss grad school. Not that I'm thinking about going back, just that I had a lot of fun.
There was another dinner, and this time, we just couldn't bear to go. The food is bad, the speakers are long-winded, there's no educational purpose to it, the room is loud... We hung around the area hoping Chris would show up so we could all go to dinner, but we never saw him, so we asked at the Radisson desk where we could go for dinner (since in our walking, we had not seen a single restaurant), and she recommended a different area of town and told us how to get there.
Before we left, we stopped in the Radisson gift shop. I like to look at tacky souvenirs, and I was hoping for a pressed penny (maybe of Saroyan!) for a special someone here at home. Well, this was, by far, the strangest gift shop I have ever set foot in. They have postcards, thimbles, and spoons, plus a couple magnets (some of which are Garfield Christmas magnets). They have sundries and junk food. I see shot glasses, but they're not Fresno shot glasses, they're just plain. I see beer steins, but one of them is a Texas one, another is German. At this point I kind of expand my gaze to take it all in and realize that most of the Radisson gift shop is a thrift store with used dishes and figurines (including porcelain clowns), and it is run by the sweet old couple watching TV behind the counter. We have no evidence of this, but when we leave, Roxanne and I discuss that we BOTH had the distinct impression that they lived there behind the store. The best thing was this handwritten sign in Sharpie that said "gourmet food." It was indicating three shelves which held (no, I'm not kidding) a can of potted meat, a can of fruit cocktail, three foil bags of tuna, a Twinkie, and a few other items. I really wish I'd had a camera.
We ate that night at Million Elephants Thai, and had a very adequate dinner. Getting back was kind of funny -- there are a number of one-way streets, and much like downtown Sacramento, sometimes they will dead end and force you onto another street going the wrong direction. We never got lost, but we did keep getting turned around and having to get back going the right direction. We stayed up late again and I tried to get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject.
This morning we walked to the Starbucks again to get a pastry and coffee, but it was closed on Sunday. Have you EVER heard of a Starbucks being closed on Sunday? I think it was just indicative of how dead Fresno is. You wouldn't believe how many vacant buildings we saw. So we had breakfast at the Radisson again (I should have had the pancakes, like I did yesterday), then got up to go to our first session and realized it had started 30 minutes before. We could have waited around for another hour for the brunch with Billy Collins or just come home. Can you guess what we did?
I know it's kind of funny that I was excited about going because I'd get to hear Firoozeh Dumas, Anchee Min, David Mas Masumoto, and Billy Collins, and then I ended up hearing none of them, but you can see how it happened, right? If I had to eat one more culinary experiment from the Fresno Radisson, I was going to barf.
Ultimately, the best parts were getting to hang out with my co-workers, getting good information from the worthwhile sessions, getting to exercise my brain on some literature, and talking at long length with Roxanne (it was one of those things where, the longer we talked, the more we went "Oh my god, me TOO!"). I'm glad we came home this afternoon, and I'm glad I have tomorrow off.
Oh, one last thing. I was a little giddy with celebrity-spotting when I first got there, and immediately spotted Firoozeh Dumas and David Mas Masumoto, plus my old professor Angus Dunstan (who I love). But there was someone my co-workers kept spotting "oh, there's Jim Burke! He's got a session later and I'm totally going!" "Really, me too! I saw Jim Burke earlier today." I have NO idea who this dude is. But in one of those sessions where we got to analyze some literature, the presenter said "read the poem, then write a paragraph about it -- what you think it means, and what led you to believe that." So I do. Then he makes us get into groups. I had written on my laptop, but didn't know we were going to have to read our paragraph to the group, so I left it on a table and went to a group. Well, I was having this brain fade when I got there, and the presenter had asked us to get into diverse groups in terms of gender, age, ethnicity, etc. He also said "no more than two men in a group." Which somehow in my brain meant "no two men in a group." So I got to the only group remaining that still needed a member and there were two men in it. I went "Oh, no more than two men in a group. We should trade with one of them or something." They all stare at me and say "we DON'T have more than two men. Unless there's something you'd like to tell us." I do the math again, realize what I've done, shake it off, and sit down. So they already think I'm a nutball. Then the presenter says "don't TELL your group what you wrote -- read it to them." So I jump up to get my laptop and I hear the other woman say "Is she coming back?" I'm feeling like a dumbass, I know I'm twenty years younger than any of them, and I have a hot pink streak in the front of my hair. Now that I have set the scene: I go first reading my paragraph, and they all look at me with their jaws dropped. "What did you do?" they asked, "start yesterday?" They all proceed to read their SENTENCE to me. Then I look at their name tags, and I'm sitting with this Jim Burke dude. I don't know whether that means anything, but I analyzed Jim Burke under the table!
I'll try to sum up and only put in the interesting bits. Thursday night I went and met ballet friend for a glass of wine. She had said 58 degrees, right by Aioili Bodega Espanol. Okay, I said, then went home and thought "oh crap, 55 degrees is not anywhere near Aioili!" So I drove around and saw the tiny wine bar that Monkeygirl and I had spotted last weekend that didn't have a sign, but was clearly a wine bar and about 2 blocks away from Aioili. I parked (got a good spot and did a great parallel parking job) and walked in. I said "I'm sorry, but can you tell me the name of this establishment?" He said it's called The Grand (which is purposely ironic, as its original purpose was as a parking garage ticket payment area, and it has exactly four little tables). I tell him the 55 degrees/Aioili story, and he says he knows what place she means, but he's not going to tell me, because I should stay there. I say that I have to at least check the other place, so he tells me where it is, and it's fifty-EIGHT degrees (did you already catch that?). I walk over, and it's really crowded, so I call LisaAnne and walk back, telling her to meet me at the Grand. We have a nice time, laugh our asses off, and she tells me she's been doing a very complicated and Catholic series of prayers for me for my baby-makin' issues, which I think is very touching and couldn't hurt. A guy walks in and sits next to us -- he clearly knows the manager, and as we're laughing and talking, he introduces himself. I think he says "Hamid" or "Habib," but I can't tell, so I ask him to clarify, and somehow he gleans that I have a connection to one of those names. He says "Oh, you know a Hamid? Tell him GHstosch hscekocken." "Well," I reply, "that won't really do any good, because I won't be able to repeat it, and if I could, he wouldn't be able to understand it. But what's it mean?" He says "It means, it means... Um, steer, ram, sheep, GOAT! Goat!" "Oh!" I nod, "goat!" He continues "um, posite, pozit, opo, paralyze." Hmm, I think. "Goat paralyze." I'm not sure I've got it. He continues for a while, and finally LisaAnne gets that he's saying "The opposite of paradise." Which is hell. So I've now been told to tell my husband "Goat hell." Which I'm not sure is very nice. I smile, and go back to my conversation. When the bill comes, it arrives with a uniball pen with red electrical tape wrapped around it. Abi (for that is his name) gets very excited, saying that it is HIS pen; he left it here the other day. It's exciting, but they can keep it of course, they can keep it. It doesn't matter. So I dig in my purse for a decent pen (I have about 20 in there) and get one out, then take Abi's pen and put it in my purse and put my pen on the table. This cracks LisaAnne and Abi up, and then LisaAnne digs a huge felt-tipped permanent marker out of her purse, steals mine, and puts the marker on the table. Then we leave, still laughing.
In the morning, I picked up Roxanne. (I usually try to disguise names, but how fucking cool is that?) We make the long drive to Fresno and arrive at about 10:40. We both thought the first "session" started at 10:45, so we're just in time. But no, there was a breakfast (where author Firoozeh Dumas, whose book I just read and enjoyed, spoke), then the first session started at ten, so we were quite late. We decided to go to a poetry reading that started at 10:50, and enjoyed that. Then there was a lunch with really atrocious pasta (how do you make pasta taste like fish?), several awards given out (and they seemed peevish that we were all eating during the awards, but they had scheduled it that way), then a poet read for a rather long time. I liked her pretty well, but my companions didn't so much.
That afternoon, there were two more sessions, then a wee break (which I spent trying to get on the internet via CityofFresnoFreeWiFIProject), then the Armenian dinner. We checked into the Super8 (the lobby smelled like curry and Lysol) and put our stuff in our room (which smelled only slightly of rancid oil and had a cool pleather back-of-a-Chevy-van-style bench). We got cleaned up a bit and went to the meeting place for the Armenian dinner. Well. First of all, I've had better food. There was no veggie option, so I gave my big-ass kabob to my pal Chris and ate the rice and green beans. There were a few snacky raw veggies and cheese and pita kind of things, and I ate those. The description of the event said "Traditional Armenian dinner, then dancing." It said something about teaching us the steps, and I thought that would be fun. What they left out (wisely), was that between dinner and dancing was a LONG-ASS lecture about Saroyan. Saroyan is a writer from Fresno, but when I say it, I always think of Star Trek. "Bones, Saroyan has already beamed to the surface." "Number one, we must find out what the Saroyan people's culture was like before the war." Saroyan. Saroyan. There's a big bronze bust of him outside the convention center, and he has the haunted, sunken eyes of Einstein, the hair of Ben Franklin, and the moustache of Sam Elliot. Well, this fucking Saroyan lecture was the most boring thing I've sat through in a LONG time. Other tables are quietly chatting, we're all pantomiming various methods of suicide -- Roxanne gets up to go to the bathroom and comes back and says "Gawd, I thought when I came back maybe he'd be done, but when I walked in he was saying 'Fast forward to 1973.'" I shift in my chair and notice a little noise. I decide to milk it. I get Chris and Roxanne's attention and I go "wait for it," then move my leg to make a fart noise. Now, I thought it was obvious that it was fake, but apparently it wasn't, because there was this very real mixture of shock, disbelief, and laughter kind of all mixed up on their faces. I thought that was so hilarious that I did it again, bigger. They soon figured the chair trick out, but not before our entire table was dying of laughter and getting dirty looks. I don't care -- people all over the room were getting up and walking out in droves. We got up and left, too. We sat in the Radisson lobby and talked for a while, then all went to our various hotels. Roxanne and I stayed up REALLY late talking. While she was in the shower, I attempted to get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject.
In the morning, we went walking to get breakfast. I had read in my complimentary copy of "Destination Fresno" that there were several coffee shops around the corner on Tulare. Well, one was vacant and two others were closed. We walked back and had breakfast in the Radisson. I had been trying to only go to sessions that I really thought I might use or could share the information with others, but this morning there was a session on dance, and how to incorporate teaching dance into English and history, getting kids to learn the Charleston at the same time you taught Gatsby... well, I was really up for a fun session, so I went to that. I'd have liked to get a little more interactive (although I did swing with the instructor) and I feel a little pissy that to get the lesson plans, I had to pay $10, but I had fun. Then one more session, then another crappy lunch -- stuffed tomatoes, and it is NOT tomato season. I tried to eat the custard tart thing that was dessert, and I seriously thought it had sat out so long it had gone bad -- it was strangely bubbly and tasted of alcohol. NASTY. Then Roxanne and I and a girl that was seated at my table skipped out early (before the long reading started again) and went to Starbucks. I got my first decent coffee and we got some chill time. The place was crawling with teachers! I was able to briefly get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject, but couldn't seem to use email, although I could use my webmail.
After lunch I went to two really worthwhile sessions. I find that the ones that try to teach you how to motivate high school students are really gimmicky and not worthwhile, so I went to two university level ones. Not only did I get stuff I can actually use in my classroom, I had a really good time. It may sound stupid, but you know when you're really good at something, how it feels good to do it? Well, in both classes, we were asked to analyze literature, discuss it, and provide evidence. And that's the kind of thing I'm REALLY good at. I had forgotten how much I liked it, and in a way, how much I miss grad school. Not that I'm thinking about going back, just that I had a lot of fun.
There was another dinner, and this time, we just couldn't bear to go. The food is bad, the speakers are long-winded, there's no educational purpose to it, the room is loud... We hung around the area hoping Chris would show up so we could all go to dinner, but we never saw him, so we asked at the Radisson desk where we could go for dinner (since in our walking, we had not seen a single restaurant), and she recommended a different area of town and told us how to get there.
Before we left, we stopped in the Radisson gift shop. I like to look at tacky souvenirs, and I was hoping for a pressed penny (maybe of Saroyan!) for a special someone here at home. Well, this was, by far, the strangest gift shop I have ever set foot in. They have postcards, thimbles, and spoons, plus a couple magnets (some of which are Garfield Christmas magnets). They have sundries and junk food. I see shot glasses, but they're not Fresno shot glasses, they're just plain. I see beer steins, but one of them is a Texas one, another is German. At this point I kind of expand my gaze to take it all in and realize that most of the Radisson gift shop is a thrift store with used dishes and figurines (including porcelain clowns), and it is run by the sweet old couple watching TV behind the counter. We have no evidence of this, but when we leave, Roxanne and I discuss that we BOTH had the distinct impression that they lived there behind the store. The best thing was this handwritten sign in Sharpie that said "gourmet food." It was indicating three shelves which held (no, I'm not kidding) a can of potted meat, a can of fruit cocktail, three foil bags of tuna, a Twinkie, and a few other items. I really wish I'd had a camera.
We ate that night at Million Elephants Thai, and had a very adequate dinner. Getting back was kind of funny -- there are a number of one-way streets, and much like downtown Sacramento, sometimes they will dead end and force you onto another street going the wrong direction. We never got lost, but we did keep getting turned around and having to get back going the right direction. We stayed up late again and I tried to get on the internet via the CityofFresnoFreeWiFiProject.
This morning we walked to the Starbucks again to get a pastry and coffee, but it was closed on Sunday. Have you EVER heard of a Starbucks being closed on Sunday? I think it was just indicative of how dead Fresno is. You wouldn't believe how many vacant buildings we saw. So we had breakfast at the Radisson again (I should have had the pancakes, like I did yesterday), then got up to go to our first session and realized it had started 30 minutes before. We could have waited around for another hour for the brunch with Billy Collins or just come home. Can you guess what we did?
I know it's kind of funny that I was excited about going because I'd get to hear Firoozeh Dumas, Anchee Min, David Mas Masumoto, and Billy Collins, and then I ended up hearing none of them, but you can see how it happened, right? If I had to eat one more culinary experiment from the Fresno Radisson, I was going to barf.
Ultimately, the best parts were getting to hang out with my co-workers, getting good information from the worthwhile sessions, getting to exercise my brain on some literature, and talking at long length with Roxanne (it was one of those things where, the longer we talked, the more we went "Oh my god, me TOO!"). I'm glad we came home this afternoon, and I'm glad I have tomorrow off.
Oh, one last thing. I was a little giddy with celebrity-spotting when I first got there, and immediately spotted Firoozeh Dumas and David Mas Masumoto, plus my old professor Angus Dunstan (who I love). But there was someone my co-workers kept spotting "oh, there's Jim Burke! He's got a session later and I'm totally going!" "Really, me too! I saw Jim Burke earlier today." I have NO idea who this dude is. But in one of those sessions where we got to analyze some literature, the presenter said "read the poem, then write a paragraph about it -- what you think it means, and what led you to believe that." So I do. Then he makes us get into groups. I had written on my laptop, but didn't know we were going to have to read our paragraph to the group, so I left it on a table and went to a group. Well, I was having this brain fade when I got there, and the presenter had asked us to get into diverse groups in terms of gender, age, ethnicity, etc. He also said "no more than two men in a group." Which somehow in my brain meant "no two men in a group." So I got to the only group remaining that still needed a member and there were two men in it. I went "Oh, no more than two men in a group. We should trade with one of them or something." They all stare at me and say "we DON'T have more than two men. Unless there's something you'd like to tell us." I do the math again, realize what I've done, shake it off, and sit down. So they already think I'm a nutball. Then the presenter says "don't TELL your group what you wrote -- read it to them." So I jump up to get my laptop and I hear the other woman say "Is she coming back?" I'm feeling like a dumbass, I know I'm twenty years younger than any of them, and I have a hot pink streak in the front of my hair. Now that I have set the scene: I go first reading my paragraph, and they all look at me with their jaws dropped. "What did you do?" they asked, "start yesterday?" They all proceed to read their SENTENCE to me. Then I look at their name tags, and I'm sitting with this Jim Burke dude. I don't know whether that means anything, but I analyzed Jim Burke under the table!
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Not counting my chickens, but...
It looks like good news. We got the money from the old house and decided to refinance the new house so that we could have lower payments. One major potential obstacle was the appraisal -- your house has to be worth a certain amount of money for them to loan you money. Anyway, I wasn't super-concerned, but the market has dropped off significantly in the six months since we bought the place. Luckily, it appraised for more than we bought it for. Which is good.
So now we will be getting a lower rate on our first mortgage (6.375, if you're interested), and the second mortgage is going to be way smaller. Our payments on each will be smaller. Sweetie's student loans will be consolidated into the second, so he won't have student loan payments anymore. We'll get about $5k out for an HVAC system (new heat and air, and we DESPERATELY need it*), and finally, we won't have a payment for March. So we'll have some free money for our pre-Easter trip to Eugene to visit the family!!
Long story short, unless something terribly wrong happens, we'll be in a much better** financial situation in about three weeks. Yay!!
*Witness: In the summer, the kitchen (the rest of the house is okay) is approximately three degrees cooler than the outdoors. And this summer, Sacramento spent a LOT of time in the hundreds. In the winter, our heater is finicky and turns off completely and is really difficult to turn back on if we put it below 72. Which means that our heating bill is through the roof, and we spend about one weekend a month in the freezing cold. So we really need a new system.
**We're not dying now, but we'll be a lot more comfortable and a lot less worried about how many groceries we can buy on the 29th of the month.
So now we will be getting a lower rate on our first mortgage (6.375, if you're interested), and the second mortgage is going to be way smaller. Our payments on each will be smaller. Sweetie's student loans will be consolidated into the second, so he won't have student loan payments anymore. We'll get about $5k out for an HVAC system (new heat and air, and we DESPERATELY need it*), and finally, we won't have a payment for March. So we'll have some free money for our pre-Easter trip to Eugene to visit the family!!
Long story short, unless something terribly wrong happens, we'll be in a much better** financial situation in about three weeks. Yay!!
*Witness: In the summer, the kitchen (the rest of the house is okay) is approximately three degrees cooler than the outdoors. And this summer, Sacramento spent a LOT of time in the hundreds. In the winter, our heater is finicky and turns off completely and is really difficult to turn back on if we put it below 72. Which means that our heating bill is through the roof, and we spend about one weekend a month in the freezing cold. So we really need a new system.
**We're not dying now, but we'll be a lot more comfortable and a lot less worried about how many groceries we can buy on the 29th of the month.
Monday, February 05, 2007
The subtle racism of "facial brighteners."
I saw this in the paper yesterday and it just made me livid. Here's the thing -- if "brighteners," formerly known as bleach, were just being advertised as something to make your skin luminous, I'd probably pass it off as just another snake oil ad. Yes, bleaches are bad and have their own racist connotations*, but this ad goes so far beyond that. I know you can't see the photo well, but allow me to describe it.
On the left, the before pic, there is an olive-skinned woman with curly brown hair, distinctly brown eyelashes and eyebrows, and mocha-colored lips. She also has blue eyes, which is a fairly unusual combination, but not unheard of. The right side, the after, has porcelain skin (which is what the product is supposed to do) but also blond hair, eyebrows, eyelashes,, and rosy lips. The after, in short, could not possibly match the before without the application of other, probably dangerous, products (I don't even know if eyelash bleaching is a cosmetic option, but let's assume it is).
Those traits, including the improbable blue eyes, are generally considered the "preferable" traits. Why? Because they're rare. Most normal women don't look like this. But okay, most normal women don't have 22 inch waists and double-E breasts, either. Our society has flipped out. But if it were just this, this constant pressure for women to fit an ideal that barely exists, I probably would have thrown the newspaper into the recycling bin with the briefest thought: "Piece of shit."
But what really bothered me is that the half a woman on the left looks ethnic, perhaps Hispanic. And on the right, there's no question -- she's white. Within African-American culture, there's a distinction between skin colors, and generally, the lighter the better. Asian women regularly use bleaching products like this because again, lighter is better. There was a study recently that immigrants with lighter skin tones make more money than those with darker skin. Do we really want to continue to perpetuate this sort of discriminiation? Wasn't it FORTY years ago that MLK hoped his children were not judged by the color of their skin? I mean, why do we still do this to each other and to ourselves? I just don't understand.
On the left, the before pic, there is an olive-skinned woman with curly brown hair, distinctly brown eyelashes and eyebrows, and mocha-colored lips. She also has blue eyes, which is a fairly unusual combination, but not unheard of. The right side, the after, has porcelain skin (which is what the product is supposed to do) but also blond hair, eyebrows, eyelashes,, and rosy lips. The after, in short, could not possibly match the before without the application of other, probably dangerous, products (I don't even know if eyelash bleaching is a cosmetic option, but let's assume it is).
Those traits, including the improbable blue eyes, are generally considered the "preferable" traits. Why? Because they're rare. Most normal women don't look like this. But okay, most normal women don't have 22 inch waists and double-E breasts, either. Our society has flipped out. But if it were just this, this constant pressure for women to fit an ideal that barely exists, I probably would have thrown the newspaper into the recycling bin with the briefest thought: "Piece of shit."
But what really bothered me is that the half a woman on the left looks ethnic, perhaps Hispanic. And on the right, there's no question -- she's white. Within African-American culture, there's a distinction between skin colors, and generally, the lighter the better. Asian women regularly use bleaching products like this because again, lighter is better. There was a study recently that immigrants with lighter skin tones make more money than those with darker skin. Do we really want to continue to perpetuate this sort of discriminiation? Wasn't it FORTY years ago that MLK hoped his children were not judged by the color of their skin? I mean, why do we still do this to each other and to ourselves? I just don't understand.
We have a weiner!
I mean, winner! Congratulations, Maria, and thanks for reading. I'll make something cool for you and probably post pictures of it.
By the way, having an ultrasound is an incredibly freaky experience. Darkened room, warm lube, freaky abstract video, a Phillipina in a nurse's uniform -- if they'd been playing Einsturzende Neubauten, it would have been 1995 at Club Dekonstrukt.
By the way, having an ultrasound is an incredibly freaky experience. Darkened room, warm lube, freaky abstract video, a Phillipina in a nurse's uniform -- if they'd been playing Einsturzende Neubauten, it would have been 1995 at Club Dekonstrukt.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
The people
All right, so yesterday was a people-watching day extraordinaire!! I was in the post office mailing a few things and I heard a voice say "There's a whole line of them out there panhandling. You should do something about it. It makes me very uncomfortable." I glance over, and it is the tallest and ugliest transvestite I have ever seen. He is about 7 feet tall in his white platform wedges (white before Memorial Day? The horror!). His feet hang a few inches off the back of said wedges. He has made no attempt to have fake boobies, but does have a large flabby gut. He's wearing a broomstick skirt and small eyelet tank top. His hair is his own (which I always think shows special dedication, but in this case is a bad choice), and is grown out to nearly shoulder length and dyed that bad old lady orangey-red that's quite faded and brassy. It's also wavy but in no particular style. Worst, he's balding, so the whole front of his scalp (up to about the, uh, prime meridian) is very thin. I was really trying not to stare, so the only reason I have this clear a description of him is that when I went outside to leave, he walked in front of my car as I was starting it.
Incidentally, the guy that was helping me at the post office is a man with a mullet superior to most. Almost all of his head is shaved with about a #2 guard on a pair of clippers, but for the almost waist-length flowing jet-black straight back. He also has little John Lennon glasses, except that they're a little more Ben Franklin than Lennon, since neither lens is bigger than about a quarter.
Later, after MG and I had left the theater and were getting into her car, we saw two girls getting out of theirs. They were presumably going to a nightclub, because there is NOWHERE else their outfits would have been considered VAGUELY appropriate, save perhaps the runway of the Victoria's Secret fashion show. One girl's outfit consisted of a trapezoid of fabric that started just over her breasts and ended just under. The rest of the "garment" was a sheer panel that hung over her belly and two straps across the back. We were about ten feet from these girls, and I was laughing on the inside at the ridiculousness of this outfit, thinking that I would go ahead and let my laughter out once we were safely soundproofed in the car or they were in the elevator. But like when you really, really have to pass gas and you're squeezing, but a little gets out anyway, my laughter suddenly became outside laughter! I really didn't mean to, but I just shrieked with laughter as I got into the car (they were about 15 feet away by this point). I just couldn't hold it! Where do you go in an outfit like that with no jacket when it's about 40 degrees out? For real?!?!?! Even to get to the very nearest club or restaurant they'd have had to walk a block. Why freeze your ass off so someone can appreciate your skanky body? Wouldn't a silky chemise and an overcoat have been as tantalizing and yet still classy? You can always check the coat, people!
* The difference between a transvestite and a drag queen is best explained by the character "Lola" in the film Kinky Boots:
"I'm not merely a transvestite,
sweetheart. I'm also a drag queen.
It's a simple equation. A drag queen puts on a frock,
looks like Kylie. A transvestite puts on a frock,
looks like... Boris Yeltsin in lipstick.
There, I said it."
Incidentally, the guy that was helping me at the post office is a man with a mullet superior to most. Almost all of his head is shaved with about a #2 guard on a pair of clippers, but for the almost waist-length flowing jet-black straight back. He also has little John Lennon glasses, except that they're a little more Ben Franklin than Lennon, since neither lens is bigger than about a quarter.
Later, after MG and I had left the theater and were getting into her car, we saw two girls getting out of theirs. They were presumably going to a nightclub, because there is NOWHERE else their outfits would have been considered VAGUELY appropriate, save perhaps the runway of the Victoria's Secret fashion show. One girl's outfit consisted of a trapezoid of fabric that started just over her breasts and ended just under. The rest of the "garment" was a sheer panel that hung over her belly and two straps across the back. We were about ten feet from these girls, and I was laughing on the inside at the ridiculousness of this outfit, thinking that I would go ahead and let my laughter out once we were safely soundproofed in the car or they were in the elevator. But like when you really, really have to pass gas and you're squeezing, but a little gets out anyway, my laughter suddenly became outside laughter! I really didn't mean to, but I just shrieked with laughter as I got into the car (they were about 15 feet away by this point). I just couldn't hold it! Where do you go in an outfit like that with no jacket when it's about 40 degrees out? For real?!?!?! Even to get to the very nearest club or restaurant they'd have had to walk a block. Why freeze your ass off so someone can appreciate your skanky body? Wouldn't a silky chemise and an overcoat have been as tantalizing and yet still classy? You can always check the coat, people!
* The difference between a transvestite and a drag queen is best explained by the character "Lola" in the film Kinky Boots:
"I'm not merely a transvestite,
sweetheart. I'm also a drag queen.
It's a simple equation. A drag queen puts on a frock,
looks like Kylie. A transvestite puts on a frock,
looks like... Boris Yeltsin in lipstick.
There, I said it."
Win a prize!!
If you read the post about Your Mama below, then you know I was sort of thinking of doing some sort of prize thing. I notice that my counter rolls around more than I suspect Monkeygirl, Mom, Sweetie, Suzanne, and Des are checking the page, so I think I have a lurker or two. (If so, welcome! Hi there!)
Anyway, if you happen to be looking at the page, scroll down and look at the counter. Is it on 10,000 views or just over? Comment on this post (or hell, on another one, I don't care) and say something to the effect of "Me! I am the ten thousandth (or something like that) visitor, and I want you to mail me something cool!"
I will do it, because I need to maintain my cred. You will do it because you like getting mail that isn't bills or junk.
Let's do it.
We will work out mailing addresses and suchlike later, since I suspect you won't want to post your home address on the world wide web.
Anyway, if you happen to be looking at the page, scroll down and look at the counter. Is it on 10,000 views or just over? Comment on this post (or hell, on another one, I don't care) and say something to the effect of "Me! I am the ten thousandth (or something like that) visitor, and I want you to mail me something cool!"
I will do it, because I need to maintain my cred. You will do it because you like getting mail that isn't bills or junk.
Let's do it.
We will work out mailing addresses and suchlike later, since I suspect you won't want to post your home address on the world wide web.
Two people who momentarily scared the shit our of me
for no good reason.
And later I'll do the people-watching.
The other day, I stayed a little late at work, and a 50ish guy in an army jacket came into my room and started approaching my desk. "Is this the ROTC room?" he asked. "No, they're the next building over." I replied. He continued approaching me and said "I guess I got by them, then."
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.
Then he took out my garbage and came back and swept. But can you see how it made my heart stop for a second?
Also, last night Monkeygirl and I went to a movie downtown. Now, I love downtown and have always felt comfortable there, but there ARE some sketchy characters. So as we approach the Crest theater, there's a tall bearded guy standing in the shadows off to the side who says "Are you going to a movie?" We say yes. He says "Are you paying cash?" We say yes. He says "You'll need to come around to the courtyard, then." The darkened courtyard with poor visibility off to the side of the theater! Monkeygirl says okay, and starts to go to the courtyard. I go "Hell no!" and start walking towards the better-lit part of the entrance.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Then she points out that he's wearing a "Crest" shirt, and I say "Oh! I'm sorry, I thought you were creepy!"
And later I'll do the people-watching.
The other day, I stayed a little late at work, and a 50ish guy in an army jacket came into my room and started approaching my desk. "Is this the ROTC room?" he asked. "No, they're the next building over." I replied. He continued approaching me and said "I guess I got by them, then."
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Then he took out my garbage and came back and swept. But can you see how it made my heart stop for a second?
Also, last night Monkeygirl and I went to a movie downtown. Now, I love downtown and have always felt comfortable there, but there ARE some sketchy characters. So as we approach the Crest theater, there's a tall bearded guy standing in the shadows off to the side who says "Are you going to a movie?" We say yes. He says "Are you paying cash?" We say yes. He says "You'll need to come around to the courtyard, then." The darkened courtyard with poor visibility off to the side of the theater! Monkeygirl says okay, and starts to go to the courtyard. I go "Hell no!" and start walking towards the better-lit part of the entrance.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Then she points out that he's wearing a "Crest" shirt, and I say "Oh! I'm sorry, I thought you were creepy!"
Saturday, February 03, 2007
People-watching
I am tired. But I am posting this to remind myself to tell you all about Sacramento's ugliest transvestite, the half-naked girl in the parking garage and the postal worker with the tiny glasses. Then perhaps I will tell you about Pan's Labyrinth (which I saw tonight with Monkeygirl) and the section of our local paper this morning that was interesting (in short, it was the entire paper from this date in 1857).
Then I will go to People Under the Stairmasters and tell you about the aerobic girl and the substitiute teacher.
Then I will go to People Under the Stairmasters and tell you about the aerobic girl and the substitiute teacher.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Nostalgic for your mama
That's why that is still a funny joke. No, back when the internets* were new, you could get any e-mail you wanted. And so mine was yourmama@earthlink.net. I also had a web site like so: http://home.earthlink.net/~yourmama I called it "Your Mama's Scene," and I updated the page about once or twice a week. It wasn't a blog, because blogs weren't invented. It was a web site that I updated with personal thoughts on a semi-weekly basis. (I even learned some HTML, and still know what FTP stands for.) With rare exception, the topic was music. I wrote almost entirely about local live shows I attended, and I attended up to five a week**. A few times, I wrote about other things, but they were mostly music-related, like the time I threw away all my jewel cases so that I could get rid of the enormous piece of furniture I was keeping my CDs on and replace it with a couple leather binders. Sounds boring, but I think it was one of the better pieces of writing I've done. All that writing is gone, now, off in the stratosphere and memory. I might have a floppy disk with some of the writings, but I might not, and my current laptop doesn't even take floppies. So for all intents and purposes, they're as gone as the burning man gets gone every year. A personal creation that has disappeared. And that's okay. But for various reasons I have been feeling a little nostalgic for the damnable thing lately.
It started with Drummergirl. She complimented my purse. She asked where I got it. I said "Oh, you know Frannie? The DJ? You'd have seen her if you ever went to any, like, Troublemakers shows. Anyway, it was her garage sale." Drummergirl says "You have so much knowledge about the local music scene. You should write something about it." Well, it was a mostly undeserved compliment -- I do know some stuff, but when I was really involved was during two distinct periods; when I was Your Mama, and when I was a Gyna. And to be honest, although I met a lot of people as a Gyna and saw a lot of bands that we played with, I didn't go out to as many other shows. So most of my knowledge is from about seven years ago. Which, in terms of local music, is hopelessly out of date. Bands I follow have moved away, broken up, gotten big... the music scene as it was then doesn't exist, and all I know is a tiny brief portion of that history. But it was fun to know that bit, and I feel a little nostalgic for the time when I knew.
I've been a little nostalgic for Your Mama also because I looked at my hit counter and saw that it was nearing 1,000. On Your Mama's Scene, I ran a little contest -- the fiftieth person (I think that was it) to look at the web site won "a bag of plastic crap." I presented one to local music writer and musician Cary Rodda and another to guitarist (and coincidentally, my co-worker now) Phil Brann. I think Phil won it, but Cary wrote the next comment expressing his disappointment that he hadn't one. I gave them both pirate eye patches and silly noses and things. Anyway, I was thinking of running a little hit counter/comment contest on here, and it just took me backc to that.***
Also, I've been playing music again lately -- bass with my uncle and singing with the staff band -- and I enjoy playing a LOT, but it does feel different. Different than the Gynas, different than being a fanboy extraordinaire...
I love music. I was making a mix for a "New Wave" themed CD swap, and I was carefully plucking one song from each artist in my iTunes library, and I ended up with 4 and a quarter hours of music. My whole library is more like ten days fo music, but I've never put all my CDs on there because I got to the Es and realized I was running quickly out of room. I decided that I could listen to Erasure and most of everything else on CDs until such time as I get an external hard drive or something to store the rest of it on. Hmm... it's getting late. My nostalgia time is up for the evening.
*I am so addicted to saying "the internets" and "the interweb" ironically and have been using them for so long now that people are going to start thinking I don't know they're wrong.
** Thursday, Friday, Saturday, a Sunday matinee and Sunday evening, or with a Tuesday show or Monday Anton Barbeau at Cafe Milazzo gig, I could skip a Sunday gig. I did it all the time.
*** I'm sure my actual hits are much higher than 1,000, since I didn't add the hit counter for oh, about two years after I started the blog. But whatever; a number's a number.
It started with Drummergirl. She complimented my purse. She asked where I got it. I said "Oh, you know Frannie? The DJ? You'd have seen her if you ever went to any, like, Troublemakers shows. Anyway, it was her garage sale." Drummergirl says "You have so much knowledge about the local music scene. You should write something about it." Well, it was a mostly undeserved compliment -- I do know some stuff, but when I was really involved was during two distinct periods; when I was Your Mama, and when I was a Gyna. And to be honest, although I met a lot of people as a Gyna and saw a lot of bands that we played with, I didn't go out to as many other shows. So most of my knowledge is from about seven years ago. Which, in terms of local music, is hopelessly out of date. Bands I follow have moved away, broken up, gotten big... the music scene as it was then doesn't exist, and all I know is a tiny brief portion of that history. But it was fun to know that bit, and I feel a little nostalgic for the time when I knew.
I've been a little nostalgic for Your Mama also because I looked at my hit counter and saw that it was nearing 1,000. On Your Mama's Scene, I ran a little contest -- the fiftieth person (I think that was it) to look at the web site won "a bag of plastic crap." I presented one to local music writer and musician Cary Rodda and another to guitarist (and coincidentally, my co-worker now) Phil Brann. I think Phil won it, but Cary wrote the next comment expressing his disappointment that he hadn't one. I gave them both pirate eye patches and silly noses and things. Anyway, I was thinking of running a little hit counter/comment contest on here, and it just took me backc to that.***
Also, I've been playing music again lately -- bass with my uncle and singing with the staff band -- and I enjoy playing a LOT, but it does feel different. Different than the Gynas, different than being a fanboy extraordinaire...
I love music. I was making a mix for a "New Wave" themed CD swap, and I was carefully plucking one song from each artist in my iTunes library, and I ended up with 4 and a quarter hours of music. My whole library is more like ten days fo music, but I've never put all my CDs on there because I got to the Es and realized I was running quickly out of room. I decided that I could listen to Erasure and most of everything else on CDs until such time as I get an external hard drive or something to store the rest of it on. Hmm... it's getting late. My nostalgia time is up for the evening.
*I am so addicted to saying "the internets" and "the interweb" ironically and have been using them for so long now that people are going to start thinking I don't know they're wrong.
** Thursday, Friday, Saturday, a Sunday matinee and Sunday evening, or with a Tuesday show or Monday Anton Barbeau at Cafe Milazzo gig, I could skip a Sunday gig. I did it all the time.
*** I'm sure my actual hits are much higher than 1,000, since I didn't add the hit counter for oh, about two years after I started the blog. But whatever; a number's a number.
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
I'm just glad...
these people aren't following me around this week. In case you're not a TV watcher, these folks are Stacey and Clinton, hosts of "What Not to Wear." And in fact, if they WERE following me around, they might decide I need $5,000 for a new wardrobe, so maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Suffice to say, I didn't want to wear my pinstripe pants today and I wore my gray pants yesterday and the khaki ones don't go with this sweater, so I thought that the black velvet ones might be festive. What I forgot or didn't realize until I was already at work is that they are really, really short. So I'm sort of re-thinking the stripey pink socks with the argyle sweater. Because now you can see the socks REALLY WELL. It's my fault. I was going to say it wasn't, but it is. See, I have long legs, so I pretty much KNOW I need to by the "tall" pants, but I never do. I try pants on with bare feet, they fit nicely, then I wear them with SHOES, and I'm taller and the pants are too short. (I know Monkeygirl is playing her tiny violin for me, since she has the opposite problem and has to get all her pants hemmed.)
Oh and also? Those people in the photo are all about pointy little heels, but my classroom is about 1/4 mile from the office, so I wear my sensible Doc Marten Mary Janes, and I'm happy.
Interestingly, I've been meaning to blog about my interview for the school newspaper. A student asked me if she could interview me, set up a time, and came over with a list of questions that apparently the newspaper class had brainstormed together. One of the later questions is "Can you tell us about your style?" I laugh, and say "Uh, do I have a style?" She looks at me very seriously and says "well, the newspaper class thinks you do." Flattery will get you everywhere, my dear!
Oh and also? Those people in the photo are all about pointy little heels, but my classroom is about 1/4 mile from the office, so I wear my sensible Doc Marten Mary Janes, and I'm happy.
Interestingly, I've been meaning to blog about my interview for the school newspaper. A student asked me if she could interview me, set up a time, and came over with a list of questions that apparently the newspaper class had brainstormed together. One of the later questions is "Can you tell us about your style?" I laugh, and say "Uh, do I have a style?" She looks at me very seriously and says "well, the newspaper class thinks you do." Flattery will get you everywhere, my dear!
Monday, January 29, 2007
Discombobulated
Ever had an off-kilter day? I always take my temperature first thing in the morning, and I didn't because I wanted to fall back asleep. Then I put my makeup on after my shower and decided I wanted to wear pink, but didn't have anything suitable wintery, so I'm wearing a pink summery blouse over a long-sleeved tee (I thought it would look like "layering," like the cool kids, but I suspect it doesn't). Then I went to make sweetie his sandwich and realized we were out of peanut butter. Then I packed my lunch but forgot my banana. At school I got the wrong packets for my 5th period class and had to go back for the right ones. I just feel like a radio station tuned in funny.
Friday, January 26, 2007
Mosemite, here I come!
Er, I mean, Yosemite. So, I went on the Yosemite trip last year and on two Point Reyes trips this year (not to mention a few day trips here and there). I know I'm a good camper, a reliable chaperone, and one of the only women who will regularly agree to go on camping trips. (I don't know why, and it's not a statement about anything, but it is much easier to get male chaperones for camping trips). Anyway, this year I have to take a computer class on Thursday nights, and I know from the last time I tried to sign up that you have to have 100% attendance -- you can't miss any classes. Well, last year we left for Yosemite on a Thursday (which is why I cancelled the class, actually). Anyway, I talked to the lead teacher this morning because I wanted to let him know I wouldn't be available for the trip if we went on a Thursday. I know that seems kind of presumptuous, like "I know you need me, so I'm letting you know in advance." But in fact, he was glad to know, and said he was thinking about going on Friday instead and returning Monday. So it all works out.
I also got an ego boost from the kids this morning. I've known for months that I was going to have a student teacher take over my 2nd period class in the second semester. I've introduced her to them, she's done a lesson with them, she's there a lot sitting in the class, and we've told them several times what's happening. But for some reason it apparently sunk in today, and the kids were shocked. Like "Are you serious? You're not going to teach us anymore? Where are you going? Why are you doing this to us? She's not going to be as much fun!" Anyway, I'm sure that a few weeks into it, they'll be like "Miss Mock-who?" But whatever, it was cute.
I guess that's all today. I have an appointment with a physical trainer at the gym this afternoon, because I haven't done it in a long time and I want to evaluate my workout routine, especially since I have some goals for ballet, and there are some muscle groups I really want to strengthen. Then I got invited to Tapas with some of the young teachers, which is flattering and might also be fun. (By the way, am I SO OLD that being invited out with the 24-25 year olds is flattering? Sad.)
I also got an ego boost from the kids this morning. I've known for months that I was going to have a student teacher take over my 2nd period class in the second semester. I've introduced her to them, she's done a lesson with them, she's there a lot sitting in the class, and we've told them several times what's happening. But for some reason it apparently sunk in today, and the kids were shocked. Like "Are you serious? You're not going to teach us anymore? Where are you going? Why are you doing this to us? She's not going to be as much fun!" Anyway, I'm sure that a few weeks into it, they'll be like "Miss Mock-who?" But whatever, it was cute.
I guess that's all today. I have an appointment with a physical trainer at the gym this afternoon, because I haven't done it in a long time and I want to evaluate my workout routine, especially since I have some goals for ballet, and there are some muscle groups I really want to strengthen. Then I got invited to Tapas with some of the young teachers, which is flattering and might also be fun. (By the way, am I SO OLD that being invited out with the 24-25 year olds is flattering? Sad.)
Thursday, January 25, 2007
The E word
So, I went to an aesthetician to do my eyebrows for two reasons: first, though I support women's choices not to conform to the patriarchy's outdated notions of femininity, I personally look like shit with a unibrow. It just doesn't fit my personal aesthetic. (But rock on to all you gals with the 'stache and stuff.) And second, I tend to do a terrible job on my own, ending up half the time with a gangsta bald patch in the middle of my eyebrow and having to crayon it back in.
Anyway, this woman, I'll call her Norma, is a little younger than I but in a similar situation in life -- recently married, thinking of having children... Anyway, I mention that we've been trying for a while with no luck, and we talk about all the stuff you do to, you know, increase your chances. Then she lowers her voice conspiritorially (to my knowledge, we are in an empty building) and says, "You know, I've never been that... regular. So I've been seeing this woman. She says it can really help with conceiving, and it makes sense, right? I mean, if your body is all backed up with those toxins, you'd have a better chance if you cleaned it all out, right?"
That's right: she never SAID the E-word, but that's what was suggested to me most recently. I'm sorry; I do want children and want them pretty badly, and I'm fairly willing to put myself through dye tests and take medications and everything, but you can keep your rubber tubing to yourself! My fanny is not involved in this business! Leave the po-po alone!
On another note, Speech and Debate's enrollment fell to the point where the class is being cancelled. And I am PERFECTLY okay with that. Two days a week where I DON'T have to stay late? Yeah, cancel me...
Anyway, this woman, I'll call her Norma, is a little younger than I but in a similar situation in life -- recently married, thinking of having children... Anyway, I mention that we've been trying for a while with no luck, and we talk about all the stuff you do to, you know, increase your chances. Then she lowers her voice conspiritorially (to my knowledge, we are in an empty building) and says, "You know, I've never been that... regular. So I've been seeing this woman. She says it can really help with conceiving, and it makes sense, right? I mean, if your body is all backed up with those toxins, you'd have a better chance if you cleaned it all out, right?"
That's right: she never SAID the E-word, but that's what was suggested to me most recently. I'm sorry; I do want children and want them pretty badly, and I'm fairly willing to put myself through dye tests and take medications and everything, but you can keep your rubber tubing to yourself! My fanny is not involved in this business! Leave the po-po alone!
On another note, Speech and Debate's enrollment fell to the point where the class is being cancelled. And I am PERFECTLY okay with that. Two days a week where I DON'T have to stay late? Yeah, cancel me...
Monday, January 22, 2007
People are weird
I made a late run to the grocery store today for a bunch of stuff we needed. I had been in my robe, so I threw on a sweatsuit. The bag boy asked "So, did you just come from the gym?" "Um, no." I guess he was probably tipped off by my rippled abs.
I got to the checkout and put my cloth tote bag in the bagging area. Then I start dealing with the payment stuff. Well, the checker tells me my total, I approve it, then I start helping bag (because my tote seems to throw all baggers for a loop). The checker then looks at my bag and says "Oh! Did you want the bag credit?" I put on my best vacant hippie look and voice and say "Naw, I just do it for the Earth, man." He laughs, but it apparently reminds him to tell the guy on the next lane something. "Hey Albert," he says "That woman who needed the ten cent refund? It was for bag credits. That's why I did the ten cent refund." Well, it was pretty clear to me that what had happened was something like with me -- the total was figured before he noticed her bags, so he just gave her a dime after it was all done. But in the meantime, the guy behind me in line has started to look a little disturbed and pipes up "I'd like mine as a credit!" Okay dude, I think they can handle it...
I got to the checkout and put my cloth tote bag in the bagging area. Then I start dealing with the payment stuff. Well, the checker tells me my total, I approve it, then I start helping bag (because my tote seems to throw all baggers for a loop). The checker then looks at my bag and says "Oh! Did you want the bag credit?" I put on my best vacant hippie look and voice and say "Naw, I just do it for the Earth, man." He laughs, but it apparently reminds him to tell the guy on the next lane something. "Hey Albert," he says "That woman who needed the ten cent refund? It was for bag credits. That's why I did the ten cent refund." Well, it was pretty clear to me that what had happened was something like with me -- the total was figured before he noticed her bags, so he just gave her a dime after it was all done. But in the meantime, the guy behind me in line has started to look a little disturbed and pipes up "I'd like mine as a credit!" Okay dude, I think they can handle it...
Bloggin' for choice
Today is official Blog for Choice day, and although I was far too lazy to sign up for the official she-bang, I wanted to be a part of it by at least writing something.
Most of you know that I'm trying to have a baby and want it really, really desperately. I can't think of a circumstance, at this point in my life, that would cause me to have an abortion. Even if something happened to my relationship, whatever, I just don't think it's for me. I also suspect that from the very instant I see two lines on the EPT, I am going to think of whatever's inside me as a life, blastocyst or zygote or whatever collection of cells it is at that point. Nope -- I'll think of it as my baby, talk to it, sing to it, eat healthily for it, love it... So when it comes to protecting MY right to an abortion? No thanks, I don't need that particular right.
But there's the rub. When it comes to protecting rights, it's not all about self-interest. It's about protecting EVERYONE'S rights. It's about protecting the girls who were raped, who are too young, who are in danger medically, who know they will be thrown out/beaten/whatever when they tell their parents. It's for the women who can't afford another child but the pill or IUD let them down. It's for a whole host of other reasons and other women that I can't even conjure up because it's so far from my personal reality. Just because I don't need an abortion doesn't mean other women don't. I hate to talk in bumper stickers, but have you seen the one that says "pro-child, pro-family, pro-choice"? That's me. Please, keep it legal -- for those who need it.
Since that was short and sweet, check out CUSS and SuperDes or click the link above for more and better blogs than this one.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Today
Well hello there! I woke up this morning, fooled around on the internet, read the newspaper, and ate breakfast (which included baklava and coffee, a heavenly combo). Sweetie's back has really been hurting, so I tried to tidy up and asked him if there was anything I could do before I left. I picked something up in the kitchen and went "OW!" As though my own back couldn't stand being out of the spotlight, I had a SERIOUS muscle spasm that is still bothering me. One of those ones where you have to stay perfectly still and breathe fro a minute. I took a hot shower and it relaxed a little.
Then I got dressed and hit the road for Benicia, where my 4th grade best friend (hereafter known by her initials, EDS) was having her baby shower. From the invitation, I could tell it was an Alice in Wonderland theme, and if you know me well, then you know I had to restrain myself from going too overboard -- ultimately I only ended up wearing two Alice pins and a necklace (plus pansy earrings 'cause they remind me of the flowers scene, but they're not technically Alice stuff). I got there, and it was this SWEET tea house, with about a googolplex of cute flowery teapots and cups and saucers everywhere. EDS was glowing, for reals. They brought us our choice of tea (I tried Creme Brulee), then all these finger sandwiches, scones with devonshire cream and strawberry jam, and little poppyseed cakes and tarts and things. We played a game where we had 30 seconds to draw a baby that would look most like EDS's, but we had to do it with the paper on top of our heads. I went for broke and just did a smiley face with one arm holding a rattle and one arm throwing up the devil horns. It came out pretty accurate, and I won (she chose her favorite). Tee hee.
Then we made scrapbook pages with advice for the new mom. I'm not a scrapbooker, so I just did my best, and I'm not a mom, so I just did my best with the advice, too. I went with "Be yourself, be strong, be there. You'll be a great mom." Then we ate cake (it was the world's cutest cake -- pretty much the exact one I cut out of the newspaper years ago as a possible wedding cake for me (but then we went with an Asian theme). It was tasty, but I'm not into fondant icing, and there was about a 2:1 ratio of icing to cake. Then EDS opened presents and she got all kinds of cute boy stuff. I think she liked the sling I got made for her.
Anyway, then the ladies who ran the tea house were kind of kicking us out (by the way, one of them looked pretty much EXACTLY like this:
I had to go to the bathroom, but we were sort of rushed and crowded, and I was only an hour from home (65 miles), and also (this may be TMI) I'm using ovulation predictors, and you're supposed to use them in the afternoon, so I was like "I'll just wait until I get home." Well, that was a mistake. You see, as soon as I got on the 80, there was one of those electronic signs that said "traffic delays Travis to Cherry Glen." I couldn't remember where Cherry Glen was, but I assumed it wasn't that far. I suspect it's only about five miles, but it took nearly half an hour. Now, there was a really gnarly accident (there was a burned out husk of a truck and a ton of emergency vehicles), but it wasn't even on our side of the freeway! Fucking rubberneckers. And now I really have to pee. Luckily, I'm only about 45 minutes from home now. Except that there's ANOTHER slowdown just after Vacaville that detains me for another 20 minutes or so! And yes, the accident (also gnarly -- at least 3 cars, one of them balancing on its side against the guardrail) was on the other side of the freeway. So it took me almost 2 hours to go 64 miles. And when I got home? Oh yeah, I peed for like five minutes straight.
The shower was really fun, and there were even Alice-themed presents for the guests! Yay! Tonight it's sushi with Monkeygirl night, which is exciting. I kind of have heavy boots*, because even though I'm really happy for my friend and had a really nice time, I'm kind of ready for it to be my turn.
*There's a rad Jonathan Safran Foer book called Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close which you should read, and the narrator, when he is sad, says that he has heavy boots.
Then I got dressed and hit the road for Benicia, where my 4th grade best friend (hereafter known by her initials, EDS) was having her baby shower. From the invitation, I could tell it was an Alice in Wonderland theme, and if you know me well, then you know I had to restrain myself from going too overboard -- ultimately I only ended up wearing two Alice pins and a necklace (plus pansy earrings 'cause they remind me of the flowers scene, but they're not technically Alice stuff). I got there, and it was this SWEET tea house, with about a googolplex of cute flowery teapots and cups and saucers everywhere. EDS was glowing, for reals. They brought us our choice of tea (I tried Creme Brulee), then all these finger sandwiches, scones with devonshire cream and strawberry jam, and little poppyseed cakes and tarts and things. We played a game where we had 30 seconds to draw a baby that would look most like EDS's, but we had to do it with the paper on top of our heads. I went for broke and just did a smiley face with one arm holding a rattle and one arm throwing up the devil horns. It came out pretty accurate, and I won (she chose her favorite). Tee hee.
Then we made scrapbook pages with advice for the new mom. I'm not a scrapbooker, so I just did my best, and I'm not a mom, so I just did my best with the advice, too. I went with "Be yourself, be strong, be there. You'll be a great mom." Then we ate cake (it was the world's cutest cake -- pretty much the exact one I cut out of the newspaper years ago as a possible wedding cake for me (but then we went with an Asian theme). It was tasty, but I'm not into fondant icing, and there was about a 2:1 ratio of icing to cake. Then EDS opened presents and she got all kinds of cute boy stuff. I think she liked the sling I got made for her.
Anyway, then the ladies who ran the tea house were kind of kicking us out (by the way, one of them looked pretty much EXACTLY like this:
I had to go to the bathroom, but we were sort of rushed and crowded, and I was only an hour from home (65 miles), and also (this may be TMI) I'm using ovulation predictors, and you're supposed to use them in the afternoon, so I was like "I'll just wait until I get home." Well, that was a mistake. You see, as soon as I got on the 80, there was one of those electronic signs that said "traffic delays Travis to Cherry Glen." I couldn't remember where Cherry Glen was, but I assumed it wasn't that far. I suspect it's only about five miles, but it took nearly half an hour. Now, there was a really gnarly accident (there was a burned out husk of a truck and a ton of emergency vehicles), but it wasn't even on our side of the freeway! Fucking rubberneckers. And now I really have to pee. Luckily, I'm only about 45 minutes from home now. Except that there's ANOTHER slowdown just after Vacaville that detains me for another 20 minutes or so! And yes, the accident (also gnarly -- at least 3 cars, one of them balancing on its side against the guardrail) was on the other side of the freeway. So it took me almost 2 hours to go 64 miles. And when I got home? Oh yeah, I peed for like five minutes straight.
The shower was really fun, and there were even Alice-themed presents for the guests! Yay! Tonight it's sushi with Monkeygirl night, which is exciting. I kind of have heavy boots*, because even though I'm really happy for my friend and had a really nice time, I'm kind of ready for it to be my turn.
*There's a rad Jonathan Safran Foer book called Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close which you should read, and the narrator, when he is sad, says that he has heavy boots.
Friday, January 19, 2007
Odd thoughts
So, it's been really cold lately. Like, see-your-breath cold. And I often toot in public (not right around others, and not loud), and I wonder whether that creates the condensation cloud, too? Is there enough moisture in it to do so? Is it mainly diffused by pants and coat? What would someone think if I looked over my shoulder at my ass area while I was walking? Could I ask someone else to look for me? And what if gas actually did come out in like a colored cloud so everyone could see it? People would know who it was right away.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
I accepted a tag thing.
Four Things
4 Jobs
1. Assistant stage manager at a local well-reviewed theatre. (For a number of different plays -- I moved furniture, set props, dressed people. I did it all.)
2. Bookstore whore. I was really good at it, too, but it was minimum wage.
3. Customer service supervisor (yes, supervisor! If you called the newspaper and were REALLY mad, you talked to me. I soothed you, then made fun of you.)
4. Substitute teacher. "You have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 earrings. My sister has eight earrings. I have to go to the bathroom."
4 movies I could watch over and over
1. The Secret of Roan Inish
2. The Princess Bride (I can recite the words, but I'll still watch it.)
3. Harold and Maude (When Cat Stevens' "Trouble" starts, I cry. Every time.)
4. Notorious. (And I still get nervous when Claude Rains meets Cary Grant carrying Ingrid Bergman down the stairs.)
4 places I've vacationed
1. Portland, OR. Beautiful.
2. Santa Cruz. One of my favorite places to go with sweetie. Beach time, bookstore time...
3. Hawaii! Big Island. God, we had fun.
4. The Virgin Gorda. I would love to go back there someday.
4 websites I visit daily (self explanatory)
1. http://www.cussandotherrants.com
2. http://www.punkymomsforum.com
3. http://diggitydes.blogspot.com (Thanks for the tag)
4. http://www.fertilityfriend.com Too much information?
4 of my favorite dishes
1. Pizza. I'm a fiend for the stuff.
2. Thai broccoli cashew.
3. Aloo kauli ko tarkari (Indian/Nepalese cauliflower and potato hot stuff.)
4. Sushi.
4 places I've lived
1. Tahoe Park area, in Sacramento. (Birth to 19.)
2. Downtown & midtown Sacramento. (19 to 25ish)
3. South Sacramento (My first house!)
4. East Sacramento (My new house!) And yes, you read it right -- I've never lived anywhere outside of Sacramento.
4 places I would rather be
1. Santa Cruz
2. Carmel/Monterey
3. Eugene, OR (the town is nice, but mostly for my in-laws, whom I miss.)
4. Someplace with warm Pacific water
4 favorite drinks
1. Cocoa
2. Coffee
3. Diet Pepsi
4. Ginger Beer
(But if I could have lots and lots of spaces for favorite drinks, there'd be wine, margaritas, tea, water, jamba juice, cranberry juice, root beer, Cherry 7-Up, and so much more!)
4 wishes
Sorry, I don't make wishes. It's a policy.
4 regrets
1. I was a real asshole to my mom when I was a teenager.
That's it. I know there are other things I could have done differently, but then my life would have turned out differently, and I like my life.
My own 4 -
4 things you wouldn't expect about me
1. I like country music. Not new stuff, but Johnny Cash, Patsy Cline, Marty Robbins, Hank Williams Sr.
2. I actually have ash blond hair hiding under all this dye.
3. I got kicked out of my first high school.
4. I like to smell like food (my fragrance collection includes ginger, satsuma, vanilla, grapefruit, lime, yuzu, and other variations on a theme.)
4 people I'm tagging
You, yes you. Plus, the next three people.
4 Jobs
1. Assistant stage manager at a local well-reviewed theatre. (For a number of different plays -- I moved furniture, set props, dressed people. I did it all.)
2. Bookstore whore. I was really good at it, too, but it was minimum wage.
3. Customer service supervisor (yes, supervisor! If you called the newspaper and were REALLY mad, you talked to me. I soothed you, then made fun of you.)
4. Substitute teacher. "You have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 earrings. My sister has eight earrings. I have to go to the bathroom."
4 movies I could watch over and over
1. The Secret of Roan Inish
2. The Princess Bride (I can recite the words, but I'll still watch it.)
3. Harold and Maude (When Cat Stevens' "Trouble" starts, I cry. Every time.)
4. Notorious. (And I still get nervous when Claude Rains meets Cary Grant carrying Ingrid Bergman down the stairs.)
4 places I've vacationed
1. Portland, OR. Beautiful.
2. Santa Cruz. One of my favorite places to go with sweetie. Beach time, bookstore time...
3. Hawaii! Big Island. God, we had fun.
4. The Virgin Gorda. I would love to go back there someday.
4 websites I visit daily (self explanatory)
1. http://www.cussandotherrants.com
2. http://www.punkymomsforum.com
3. http://diggitydes.blogspot.com (Thanks for the tag)
4. http://www.fertilityfriend.com Too much information?
4 of my favorite dishes
1. Pizza. I'm a fiend for the stuff.
2. Thai broccoli cashew.
3. Aloo kauli ko tarkari (Indian/Nepalese cauliflower and potato hot stuff.)
4. Sushi.
4 places I've lived
1. Tahoe Park area, in Sacramento. (Birth to 19.)
2. Downtown & midtown Sacramento. (19 to 25ish)
3. South Sacramento (My first house!)
4. East Sacramento (My new house!) And yes, you read it right -- I've never lived anywhere outside of Sacramento.
4 places I would rather be
1. Santa Cruz
2. Carmel/Monterey
3. Eugene, OR (the town is nice, but mostly for my in-laws, whom I miss.)
4. Someplace with warm Pacific water
4 favorite drinks
1. Cocoa
2. Coffee
3. Diet Pepsi
4. Ginger Beer
(But if I could have lots and lots of spaces for favorite drinks, there'd be wine, margaritas, tea, water, jamba juice, cranberry juice, root beer, Cherry 7-Up, and so much more!)
4 wishes
Sorry, I don't make wishes. It's a policy.
4 regrets
1. I was a real asshole to my mom when I was a teenager.
That's it. I know there are other things I could have done differently, but then my life would have turned out differently, and I like my life.
My own 4 -
4 things you wouldn't expect about me
1. I like country music. Not new stuff, but Johnny Cash, Patsy Cline, Marty Robbins, Hank Williams Sr.
2. I actually have ash blond hair hiding under all this dye.
3. I got kicked out of my first high school.
4. I like to smell like food (my fragrance collection includes ginger, satsuma, vanilla, grapefruit, lime, yuzu, and other variations on a theme.)
4 people I'm tagging
You, yes you. Plus, the next three people.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Work isn't bad, just...
1: We had a "student study team" (SST) meeting about a student yesterday. I've been to whole conferences about how to do an SST effectively. Some points to note -- it includes the parent and student, begins with the student's strengths, addresses ways we can help the student be successful. Some things we did yesterday? Went ahead with no parent or student, and the first question out of anyone's mouth was "Okay, whose classes is she failing?" And that was the counselor, who was leading the meeting.
2: The department meetings, which are only held monthly, are beyond useless. We are talked down to, handed stuff to do without being given any chance for input or collaboration, and are basically a big waste of time. So my neighbor teacher and some other teachers decided to skip it and hold our own meetings -- take minutes and everything. Well, the principal came and found us, got pissed, told us we HAD to go to the department meeting, and basically escorted us out of the room. I felt like a teenager in trouble again. But like the other group said, we got A LOT DONE before we got sent to the meeting. It just seems pointless.
2: The department meetings, which are only held monthly, are beyond useless. We are talked down to, handed stuff to do without being given any chance for input or collaboration, and are basically a big waste of time. So my neighbor teacher and some other teachers decided to skip it and hold our own meetings -- take minutes and everything. Well, the principal came and found us, got pissed, told us we HAD to go to the department meeting, and basically escorted us out of the room. I felt like a teenager in trouble again. But like the other group said, we got A LOT DONE before we got sent to the meeting. It just seems pointless.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Happy Birthday to me and to Martin Luther King.
Lookee here for old time happy birthday video goodness.
Sorry about the obnoxious, can't-turn-it-off Stevie Wonder pre-edit.
Sorry about the obnoxious, can't-turn-it-off Stevie Wonder pre-edit.
Sunday morning coming down
Hi everybody. Well, this morning, we checked out of the hotel (they let us leave the car there until noon, though), then got breakfast at Cafe Noir. Sweetie enjoyed his latte, too. I had pain au chocolate, which is SO WRONG, but I love the stuff... I like that place. I would definitely go back.
My first session was another principal of a small school in San Diego. He was talking about ways to personalize your school, to make kids feel a part of a community. It was enjoyable, and he had a lot of good ideas. I definitely thought about things like having t-shirts with our logo (I'm stil pushing for us to be IS/ES, International Studies and Environmental Science, instead of IES, International and Environmental Studies. See, if you turn that slash into a lightning bolt, it's INSTANT COOL). He asked us for other examples, and I asked whether our "ugly tie day" would count. He LOVED that, and even brought it up at the panel discussion later.
My second session was with one of this year's teachers of the year. His workshop was on poverty and how it affects our kids in the classroom. I had read a lot on the same subject before, like Ruby Payne's book. It's interesting stuff, but most of it wasn't new. I did, however, like some of his practical ideas for teaching register (i.e. the language you use for certain situations).
The final thing was the panel discussion. It sounded dull, but they were doing a drawing for free registration to the July conference in Maui, so I was like "what the hell." It was, in fact, pretty dull. The problem with panel discussions is that if there are seven people on the panel, ann seven feel like they have to say SOMETHING in answer to each question, whether they have anything important to say or not. SO one question takes like ten minutes to answer, and they just end up repeating each other. Lame. And I didn't win the drawing. Interestingly, when I was putting my survey in the basket for the drawing, one of the ladies sitting at the table was like "I was at a session with you earlier. You were really taking a lot of notes!" I answered pleasantly, "well, if my school is going to send me to Monterey for the weekend, I figure they should get something out of it." But I wondered, would she have said the same thing to a 50 year old guy in a suit? Was it the nose ring or the funky hair? It was a little... condescending, kind of. I mean, hell yes I take good notes! Why isn't everyone else?
Then I went to the little shop where I found a cute dress on sale yesterday, but it didn't fit my apparently wine-barrel-sized ribcage. It fit my waist fine, it was just my giant torso that the dress wouldn't accommodate. Then I met sweetie and we got the car and went looking for a place to have lunch. Since "Turtle Bay Taqueria" had a parking lot, but all its spaces were for some laundromat, we went to the Paris Bakery. I had a sandwich that was better than it looked. The bread was really fresh and good, and it had jicama and carrots. A lot of veggie sandwiches go really overboard on cheese and avocado, thinking that a veggie sandwich could not possibly be good without them, but this one just had small amounts of each for a nice balance. Then we each got a sweet! I had a "chocolate triangle," which was sort of a shortbread-y almond thing with chocolate on it. Plus we got to eavesdrop on a wannabe librarian who can't get a job. He was really sad and pathetic, but what was worse was that he and an older female companion were there with a Japanese (?) woman who was not talking much, and the way they were talking to her, it was clear she was not an American. They had, and I am not kidding, probably the longest conversation about the Brady Bunch I have ever been privy to. And it went into great detail and they spoke with great reverence about the show, its cultural impact, and Barry Williams. I am not fucking with you when I say that part of the conversation went like this: "There's an actor named Barry Williams. He was a child star, or, not a child, but perhaps an adolescent when the show began. He was on a show called the Brady Bunch, and he played the eldest of three brothers." Later there was some talk from the older woman about having choreographed a dance to "Sunshine Day." We were sitting right next to them, so I'm sure you can imagine the kind of bug-eyes we were making at each other to indicate "Can you believe this shit? Are you listening to this?" while pretending to enjoy our sandwiches in comfortable silence.
Then we drove home. It was fairly uneventful, although we did stop at Casa de Fruta. Casa de Fruta is a glorified fruit stand, but over the years it has gained Casa de Restaurant, Casa de Choo-Choo (a train ride for the kids), and Casa de pretty-much-whatever-you-could-want. It's goofy. But I got a bottle of Pomegranate wine and some taffy. I love that place -- they have like four thousand bottles of olives. It was so cold in there that the olive oil was all solid!
Which brings me to... California is having a cold snap. It's fucking cold. I don't like it. It's cold all over. My car has an outside temperature gauge, and the warmest it got anywhere we went today was 51. Now I know, that's not like someplace in the midwest, but... but we're in California!!
A few other notes: Teachers like free food. At the exhibitors' tables, many of them had candy out. I think the unspoken rule is that you have to listen to at least part of their sales pitch to earn your candy, but many people just wander by, grab a handful of M&Ms, and keep walking. I feel bad for the salespeople. Also, they put out bagels and pastries, and if you weren't movin' fast, they were GONE.
Also, I know it's all too common -- everybody leaves cell phones on during big group events. It just irks me that it happens in gian groups of teachers. Know why? 'Cause it's SO hypocritical. Like, if THEY were teaching in front of a group, they'd go ballistic if a kid's phone went off. They'd say "It's very rude to have your phone ring in class. It's completely disrespecful of my teaching." And yet 20 phones must have rung during one focus session, and a bunch of those people took the calls and went outside. Hmph.
That's about it, I think. I had a nice time. Take care, everybody!
My first session was another principal of a small school in San Diego. He was talking about ways to personalize your school, to make kids feel a part of a community. It was enjoyable, and he had a lot of good ideas. I definitely thought about things like having t-shirts with our logo (I'm stil pushing for us to be IS/ES, International Studies and Environmental Science, instead of IES, International and Environmental Studies. See, if you turn that slash into a lightning bolt, it's INSTANT COOL). He asked us for other examples, and I asked whether our "ugly tie day" would count. He LOVED that, and even brought it up at the panel discussion later.
My second session was with one of this year's teachers of the year. His workshop was on poverty and how it affects our kids in the classroom. I had read a lot on the same subject before, like Ruby Payne's book. It's interesting stuff, but most of it wasn't new. I did, however, like some of his practical ideas for teaching register (i.e. the language you use for certain situations).
The final thing was the panel discussion. It sounded dull, but they were doing a drawing for free registration to the July conference in Maui, so I was like "what the hell." It was, in fact, pretty dull. The problem with panel discussions is that if there are seven people on the panel, ann seven feel like they have to say SOMETHING in answer to each question, whether they have anything important to say or not. SO one question takes like ten minutes to answer, and they just end up repeating each other. Lame. And I didn't win the drawing. Interestingly, when I was putting my survey in the basket for the drawing, one of the ladies sitting at the table was like "I was at a session with you earlier. You were really taking a lot of notes!" I answered pleasantly, "well, if my school is going to send me to Monterey for the weekend, I figure they should get something out of it." But I wondered, would she have said the same thing to a 50 year old guy in a suit? Was it the nose ring or the funky hair? It was a little... condescending, kind of. I mean, hell yes I take good notes! Why isn't everyone else?
Then I went to the little shop where I found a cute dress on sale yesterday, but it didn't fit my apparently wine-barrel-sized ribcage. It fit my waist fine, it was just my giant torso that the dress wouldn't accommodate. Then I met sweetie and we got the car and went looking for a place to have lunch. Since "Turtle Bay Taqueria" had a parking lot, but all its spaces were for some laundromat, we went to the Paris Bakery. I had a sandwich that was better than it looked. The bread was really fresh and good, and it had jicama and carrots. A lot of veggie sandwiches go really overboard on cheese and avocado, thinking that a veggie sandwich could not possibly be good without them, but this one just had small amounts of each for a nice balance. Then we each got a sweet! I had a "chocolate triangle," which was sort of a shortbread-y almond thing with chocolate on it. Plus we got to eavesdrop on a wannabe librarian who can't get a job. He was really sad and pathetic, but what was worse was that he and an older female companion were there with a Japanese (?) woman who was not talking much, and the way they were talking to her, it was clear she was not an American. They had, and I am not kidding, probably the longest conversation about the Brady Bunch I have ever been privy to. And it went into great detail and they spoke with great reverence about the show, its cultural impact, and Barry Williams. I am not fucking with you when I say that part of the conversation went like this: "There's an actor named Barry Williams. He was a child star, or, not a child, but perhaps an adolescent when the show began. He was on a show called the Brady Bunch, and he played the eldest of three brothers." Later there was some talk from the older woman about having choreographed a dance to "Sunshine Day." We were sitting right next to them, so I'm sure you can imagine the kind of bug-eyes we were making at each other to indicate "Can you believe this shit? Are you listening to this?" while pretending to enjoy our sandwiches in comfortable silence.
Then we drove home. It was fairly uneventful, although we did stop at Casa de Fruta. Casa de Fruta is a glorified fruit stand, but over the years it has gained Casa de Restaurant, Casa de Choo-Choo (a train ride for the kids), and Casa de pretty-much-whatever-you-could-want. It's goofy. But I got a bottle of Pomegranate wine and some taffy. I love that place -- they have like four thousand bottles of olives. It was so cold in there that the olive oil was all solid!
Which brings me to... California is having a cold snap. It's fucking cold. I don't like it. It's cold all over. My car has an outside temperature gauge, and the warmest it got anywhere we went today was 51. Now I know, that's not like someplace in the midwest, but... but we're in California!!
A few other notes: Teachers like free food. At the exhibitors' tables, many of them had candy out. I think the unspoken rule is that you have to listen to at least part of their sales pitch to earn your candy, but many people just wander by, grab a handful of M&Ms, and keep walking. I feel bad for the salespeople. Also, they put out bagels and pastries, and if you weren't movin' fast, they were GONE.
Also, I know it's all too common -- everybody leaves cell phones on during big group events. It just irks me that it happens in gian groups of teachers. Know why? 'Cause it's SO hypocritical. Like, if THEY were teaching in front of a group, they'd go ballistic if a kid's phone went off. They'd say "It's very rude to have your phone ring in class. It's completely disrespecful of my teaching." And yet 20 phones must have rung during one focus session, and a bunch of those people took the calls and went outside. Hmph.
That's about it, I think. I had a nice time. Take care, everybody!
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Monterey day 3
Well, this morning started out very nicely, and we had bagels, and then I went to my conference.
The first speaker, Richard Ramsey, looked like Barry White and had a rhetorical style that is familiar to anyone who has attended Baptist services at a predominately African-American church. It was entertaining, although the guy used a TON of familiar cliches, apocryphal stories, and e-mails I've been forwarded recently. Like, the one about the voice mail for the psychiatric hotline (seen it? You know, "Obsessive-compulsives, please press 1 repeatedly" etc.) and the one about the teacher whose 5th grade student brought her a half-empty bottle of cheap perfume, but it had been his dead mom's and now he's going to Harvard. If you'd like, you can read it here at Snopes. It's, uh, fiction. But very touching, y'know?
Then I went to my first session, which was with a soft-spoken man who didn't seem to know 100% why he was there. About halfway through, several members of the audience started asking him questions about the structure of his school and the resources like computers (which was NOT the topic of the workshop) and he answered them all very pleasantly, as though we'd gone ahead and switched to a Q and A session. Then I had a break, and I met Sweetie for lunch and Petra's, which was Middle-Eastern-esque. I had dolmas, hummus, falafel, and tabouli. It wasn't the world's best, but it was perfectly decent and I left full and happy. I walked Sweet stuff back to the hotel, then turned around and walked back, stopping in a cute clothing store and Cafe Noir, where I had a delightful latte! Really yummy.
Then came the afternoon sessions. I had had difficulty deciding which to attend. One was a little over two hours long and sounded most interesting, but it was clearly intended for administrators and counselors. Then there were some that sounded okay, and were only an hour each. I chose those, just so we'd be able to take different perspectives back to school (I knew one of the other teachers was going to the long one). Anyway, the first one was from the Ford Fund, and it was trying to convince us to use their curriculum which, though it looked kind of interesting, seemed to be an elective that wouldn't meet college requirements. And you know, therefore TOTALLY USELESS.
The final session was actually really interesting. I took copious notes and stayed after to talk to the presenters. They were the principals of two small high schools that both occupied space on the same campus. It was a large comprehensive high school that "broke up" into six small schools. They shared some resources like the library, and they kept the athletic department together, but each school had a distinct administration, its own web site, its own programs and focus... They had to divide the books in the bookroom and the copiers and everything. It sounds difficult, but possibly really worthwhile. WHat was even better was that the female presenter was the principal of the "International Studies" school, which had an IB program, so her school was very similar to my small learning community. I got a lot of good information.
I walked back to the hotel, but only had about 4 minutes to get to a meeting that had been arranged -- I thought it was just for our school (and that therefore it would be short and I could sneak out to dinner), but there were three schools there, and the third was considering going to SLCs, so they wanted to know what the process was like and what the pros and cons were. So it ended up being a little over an hour. Oh well.
Then we went to my birthday dinner. Boompah had recommended Montrio, and we walked there, but we hadn't thought to make reservations, and the next available one was two hours away! We walked instead to Stokes Adobe, where we've eaten before (also on Boompah's recommendation), and had a great dinner! We had a caramelized onion and olive focaccia, then sweetie had a rare steak and I had a pesto and feta and tomato pizza. For dessert, we had a Scharffen Berger dark chocolate torte and I had a glass of port while Sweetie had Bonny Doon Framboise. Everything was great. The torte had strawberry coulis that was super-yummy. I was trying to figure out what was in it, but it tasted EXACTLY like strawberry Merlinos. (I realize that doesn't mean much to you, but Merlino's Freeze is a local treat, and it's a fruit freeze that's delicious and inimitable.)
Now we're back at the hotel. It's really cold, but with the Comfort Zone heater, we're comfortable. And now I'm 31 and it doesn't feel different, but I'm happy. I'm happy a lot.
The first speaker, Richard Ramsey, looked like Barry White and had a rhetorical style that is familiar to anyone who has attended Baptist services at a predominately African-American church. It was entertaining, although the guy used a TON of familiar cliches, apocryphal stories, and e-mails I've been forwarded recently. Like, the one about the voice mail for the psychiatric hotline (seen it? You know, "Obsessive-compulsives, please press 1 repeatedly" etc.) and the one about the teacher whose 5th grade student brought her a half-empty bottle of cheap perfume, but it had been his dead mom's and now he's going to Harvard. If you'd like, you can read it here at Snopes. It's, uh, fiction. But very touching, y'know?
Then I went to my first session, which was with a soft-spoken man who didn't seem to know 100% why he was there. About halfway through, several members of the audience started asking him questions about the structure of his school and the resources like computers (which was NOT the topic of the workshop) and he answered them all very pleasantly, as though we'd gone ahead and switched to a Q and A session. Then I had a break, and I met Sweetie for lunch and Petra's, which was Middle-Eastern-esque. I had dolmas, hummus, falafel, and tabouli. It wasn't the world's best, but it was perfectly decent and I left full and happy. I walked Sweet stuff back to the hotel, then turned around and walked back, stopping in a cute clothing store and Cafe Noir, where I had a delightful latte! Really yummy.
Then came the afternoon sessions. I had had difficulty deciding which to attend. One was a little over two hours long and sounded most interesting, but it was clearly intended for administrators and counselors. Then there were some that sounded okay, and were only an hour each. I chose those, just so we'd be able to take different perspectives back to school (I knew one of the other teachers was going to the long one). Anyway, the first one was from the Ford Fund, and it was trying to convince us to use their curriculum which, though it looked kind of interesting, seemed to be an elective that wouldn't meet college requirements. And you know, therefore TOTALLY USELESS.
The final session was actually really interesting. I took copious notes and stayed after to talk to the presenters. They were the principals of two small high schools that both occupied space on the same campus. It was a large comprehensive high school that "broke up" into six small schools. They shared some resources like the library, and they kept the athletic department together, but each school had a distinct administration, its own web site, its own programs and focus... They had to divide the books in the bookroom and the copiers and everything. It sounds difficult, but possibly really worthwhile. WHat was even better was that the female presenter was the principal of the "International Studies" school, which had an IB program, so her school was very similar to my small learning community. I got a lot of good information.
I walked back to the hotel, but only had about 4 minutes to get to a meeting that had been arranged -- I thought it was just for our school (and that therefore it would be short and I could sneak out to dinner), but there were three schools there, and the third was considering going to SLCs, so they wanted to know what the process was like and what the pros and cons were. So it ended up being a little over an hour. Oh well.
Then we went to my birthday dinner. Boompah had recommended Montrio, and we walked there, but we hadn't thought to make reservations, and the next available one was two hours away! We walked instead to Stokes Adobe, where we've eaten before (also on Boompah's recommendation), and had a great dinner! We had a caramelized onion and olive focaccia, then sweetie had a rare steak and I had a pesto and feta and tomato pizza. For dessert, we had a Scharffen Berger dark chocolate torte and I had a glass of port while Sweetie had Bonny Doon Framboise. Everything was great. The torte had strawberry coulis that was super-yummy. I was trying to figure out what was in it, but it tasted EXACTLY like strawberry Merlinos. (I realize that doesn't mean much to you, but Merlino's Freeze is a local treat, and it's a fruit freeze that's delicious and inimitable.)
Now we're back at the hotel. It's really cold, but with the Comfort Zone heater, we're comfortable. And now I'm 31 and it doesn't feel different, but I'm happy. I'm happy a lot.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Monterey day 2
Well hello there! This morning we got up and got ready to go. We went to the lobby where they were supposed to be offering a "healthy breakfast," but it was Otis Spunkmeyer chocolate muffins, apples, and a couple kinds of cereal with Vitamin D milk. So, kind of not my bag. We went across the street to the Wild Plum Cafe, which was organic! It was super-yummy and cute inside. It was hard to choose what to have, since everything looked good, but I just had an apple-y muffin and a coffee. Then Sweetie walked me to my conference, and I registered and went to the first session. It was an interesting speaker named Rick DuFour, who talked about professional learning communities and how to really take action to improve a school rather than just having a philosophy. He had a good sense of humor and made a lot of really accurate fun of things like mission statements. He also had a good analogy about a team. He said "talk to someone next to you and tell them what a team is." We said "A group of people working together toward a common goal." He said "Okay, did anyone say 'A group of people working together toward a common goal'?" The laughter let me know we were not alone. He pointed out that that would apply to a group of marathoners (their goal is to finish the marathon), but that they aren't a team because they aren't working together collaborately and interdependently. It was a good point.
There was a little break where I wandered around and exhibitors tempted me with candy (but I resisted!) and I got free junk. I also had an apple. Then I went to another session, and this one had a lot of potential, but kind of didn't realize it. Like, it was abotu project-based learning, and how you had to have a good guiding question, but they never really told us HOW to get there or gave us relevant examples.
Then it was lunch. I know you want me to tell you about the charming bistro I went to, but I was feeling cheap, so I had Subway. It didn't take the whole hour, so I read a little of my new book (Funny in Farsi), then went to Cafe Noir to get a latte. but I didn't have cash, so I had to go elsewhere. I want to go back though, because it looked like they had yummy food and baklava! It was a cute little place with wireless, too. Anyway, I went to Bay Books (which also had coffee), then went to my next thing, which was with the same guy from the morning. It was in more depth about how to make learning communities really work in a school, and what it really means to have consensus. I like the guy. There was a short film showign what can happen when a freshman hits high school and isn't doing well -- it had a sense of humor about it, but was sadly realistic. Counselors who didn't know the kid or have his grades. Teachers who put him into a lower class because they thought it must be too hard. Other teachers with completely different theories and different ways of dealing with him, and therefore no agreement at all. And all the time, the mom being told there was nothing she could do, because it was up to Johnny. A sad state of affairs.
After that session (which was long), I took a scenic walk back to the hotel and saw my sweetie. We chilled for just a bit, then went to dinner.
We were having trouble deciding were to go. There was a middle-eastern place, and that sounded good, but it was one of those places that has a poster of a lady with 80s hair that's faded as hell and says "Gyros" on it. It wasn't a good sign (no pun intended.) We flipped a coin, then went to Ocean Sushi Deli. It -- really was a deli. A sushi deli. Like, it sold packaged food to go (including a variety of Japanese pickles), dry goods (Pocky, Sriracha sauce, curry powder, tea, SnapPea Crisps...), but you could also go to the counter and order sushi, or a really wide variety of other food, like ramen, soba, udon, bento boxes, salads, teriyaki... The menu was on laminated cards that were hanging and spread all over two surfaces. There were probably 60 individual cards, yet when I asked whether they had inari, they looked at yet ANOTHER menu printed on paper. Anyway, there was, and I had it, an avo-kyu (which is a Japanes-ation of avocado-cucumber), and a bowl of ramen. The sushi was pretty good. The ramen was all right. The noodles were about Top Ramen quality, and after going to Toshi's ramen house in Eugene, Oregon, I think I'm an inadvertent ramen snob.
Anyway, now we're back at the hotel and it's only 7:40, but we're probably settled for the night. It's peaceful and warm and High Fidelity is on.
Good nightk, take care! Tomorrow I'll be 31!
There was a little break where I wandered around and exhibitors tempted me with candy (but I resisted!) and I got free junk. I also had an apple. Then I went to another session, and this one had a lot of potential, but kind of didn't realize it. Like, it was abotu project-based learning, and how you had to have a good guiding question, but they never really told us HOW to get there or gave us relevant examples.
Then it was lunch. I know you want me to tell you about the charming bistro I went to, but I was feeling cheap, so I had Subway. It didn't take the whole hour, so I read a little of my new book (Funny in Farsi), then went to Cafe Noir to get a latte. but I didn't have cash, so I had to go elsewhere. I want to go back though, because it looked like they had yummy food and baklava! It was a cute little place with wireless, too. Anyway, I went to Bay Books (which also had coffee), then went to my next thing, which was with the same guy from the morning. It was in more depth about how to make learning communities really work in a school, and what it really means to have consensus. I like the guy. There was a short film showign what can happen when a freshman hits high school and isn't doing well -- it had a sense of humor about it, but was sadly realistic. Counselors who didn't know the kid or have his grades. Teachers who put him into a lower class because they thought it must be too hard. Other teachers with completely different theories and different ways of dealing with him, and therefore no agreement at all. And all the time, the mom being told there was nothing she could do, because it was up to Johnny. A sad state of affairs.
After that session (which was long), I took a scenic walk back to the hotel and saw my sweetie. We chilled for just a bit, then went to dinner.
We were having trouble deciding were to go. There was a middle-eastern place, and that sounded good, but it was one of those places that has a poster of a lady with 80s hair that's faded as hell and says "Gyros" on it. It wasn't a good sign (no pun intended.) We flipped a coin, then went to Ocean Sushi Deli. It -- really was a deli. A sushi deli. Like, it sold packaged food to go (including a variety of Japanese pickles), dry goods (Pocky, Sriracha sauce, curry powder, tea, SnapPea Crisps...), but you could also go to the counter and order sushi, or a really wide variety of other food, like ramen, soba, udon, bento boxes, salads, teriyaki... The menu was on laminated cards that were hanging and spread all over two surfaces. There were probably 60 individual cards, yet when I asked whether they had inari, they looked at yet ANOTHER menu printed on paper. Anyway, there was, and I had it, an avo-kyu (which is a Japanes-ation of avocado-cucumber), and a bowl of ramen. The sushi was pretty good. The ramen was all right. The noodles were about Top Ramen quality, and after going to Toshi's ramen house in Eugene, Oregon, I think I'm an inadvertent ramen snob.
Anyway, now we're back at the hotel and it's only 7:40, but we're probably settled for the night. It's peaceful and warm and High Fidelity is on.
Good nightk, take care! Tomorrow I'll be 31!
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Monterey!
Well, this morning did not start off auspiciously -- I stayed up late last night writing good sub plans so I could play hooky today. You see, I wanted to go to the aquarium, and we realized, looking at the conference schedule, that we wouldn't be able to if I didn't skip work today. Anyway, so I made these great lesson plans and e-mailed them to myself so I could print them at work. I go to work this morning early, and the network is down! No e-mail for me! I quickly write the lesson plans again and get out with only two kids having spotted me.
Then I had about 62 things to do before I left the house, but finally everything was clean (relatively), secure, and prepared. We got on the road. After just one wrong turn (in town, duh -- I spaced out and passed the bank!), we got all the way to Santa Nella in pretty good time. Traffic was relatively light, and I only had to flip off one car (full of old people -- I feel a little bad, but just because you were fraternity brothers with Henry Ford does not mean you can safely follow me at 80 mph with one car length to spare). We were hungry, so we stopped at the only place that seemed vaguely worth it, Taco Bell. On average, it's been four years since we've been there (3 for him, 5 for me), and it was kind of odd -- like, refreshing to realize that it tastes exactly the same as it ever did, but also strange and foreign and, well, don't look inside when you put your hot sauce on. We figure it'll be another four years or so before our next visit.
Finally, we made it to Monterey. We parked about a block from the place we stayed last time we were here, the Jabberwock Inn. We were both feeling a little nostalgic, and plan to come back when they open the otter exhibit at the aquarium. We walked straight to the aquarium today and bought our tickets. Inside, we saw the kelp forest, anemones, jellyfish (which light up with rainbow colors), white sharks, the single great white that they have there now (only the second to survive in captivity!), giant tuna, dolphinfish (also known as mahi mahi -- we had to leave this display because sweetie was salivating), a very creepy humungous sunfish... then we went outside briefly (it was cold) and saw an otter playing in the bay. We saw anchovies swimming in silver circles. We touched bat rays, starfish, gumboot chitons, decorator crabs (which pick little bits of vegetation and attach them to hooks on their bodies for camoflauge), urchins, cow's tongue... then sweetie briefly wiped me off with a wadded up paper towel he picked up from god knows where.
We went into the auditorium to watch what we thought was going to be a short film on jellyfish, but in actuality it was a question and answer session with big gay Raoul. I just wanted melodic new agey music and footage of jellyfish, but I did pick up the powerful new terms "mouth-arms" and "mouth-anus." Yeah, jellyfish are simple, so their bits kind of have to multi-task. Then we watched otter feeding and training time! I've really been an otter fan for a long time. I had a Monterey Bay Aquarium otter t-shirt when I was about five, AND I remember it, which I think is telling. Anyway, it was totally cool, and I got one good picture before my camera batteries died.
Back at the kelp forest, I saw something odd. Sweetie had wandered a little bit away. I looked for a docent, and found a little old man in a red jacket who was currently helping another couple. When he finished, I began. "Excuse me," I said. "But why is there romaine lettuce attached to a string floating in the tank there?" He looked very surprised. We went over to examine. "Is it an elaborate prank, or is there some reason for it?" He looked very puzzled. There was, in fact, a floater with a string attached. At the bottom, there was a weight. All along the length, there were leaves of romaine, swaying in the movement of the water. Fortunately, some other people were wandering by who had just heard the story and were able to explain. Apparently, this isn't "kelp season," so there isn't enough to harvest, so they're seeing if the fish will eat lettuce instead. It looked strange.
Then we, um... we wandered around the aquarium a lot. I can't remember everything we saw. But I guarantee, if it lit up, spun, showed a short film, hid in the sand at the touch of a lever, got sucked into its exoskeleton with a pull, could be coaxed out of a wall, resembled a video game, or crashed over thick-walled glass, we participated in it. The photo is me sitting in a (fake and not to scale) penguin egg. I call it "I'm a penguin again" because there's another photo of me just like it in pink with long blond hair from last time we were here.
We came and checked into the hotel, which is okay -- the "high speed wireless internet" isn't really that fast or reliable. But it's warm and clean, so we're happy. For dinner we went to the Thai restaurant across the street. The service was a little unnerving, but the food was actually pretty good. It was only "white people" hot, but the veggies were all really fresh and perfectly done, and it was seasoned well. Unlike a few Thai restaurants I've been to, you can distinctly tell the difference between dishes. Some places it seems like everything is kind of the same. Then we took a walk around to partly burn off dinner. The conference is at the Marriot, which is very nearby and easily walkable.
Okay, I guess that's it. I'm sure I'll update more tomorrow.
Then I had about 62 things to do before I left the house, but finally everything was clean (relatively), secure, and prepared. We got on the road. After just one wrong turn (in town, duh -- I spaced out and passed the bank!), we got all the way to Santa Nella in pretty good time. Traffic was relatively light, and I only had to flip off one car (full of old people -- I feel a little bad, but just because you were fraternity brothers with Henry Ford does not mean you can safely follow me at 80 mph with one car length to spare). We were hungry, so we stopped at the only place that seemed vaguely worth it, Taco Bell. On average, it's been four years since we've been there (3 for him, 5 for me), and it was kind of odd -- like, refreshing to realize that it tastes exactly the same as it ever did, but also strange and foreign and, well, don't look inside when you put your hot sauce on. We figure it'll be another four years or so before our next visit.
Finally, we made it to Monterey. We parked about a block from the place we stayed last time we were here, the Jabberwock Inn. We were both feeling a little nostalgic, and plan to come back when they open the otter exhibit at the aquarium. We walked straight to the aquarium today and bought our tickets. Inside, we saw the kelp forest, anemones, jellyfish (which light up with rainbow colors), white sharks, the single great white that they have there now (only the second to survive in captivity!), giant tuna, dolphinfish (also known as mahi mahi -- we had to leave this display because sweetie was salivating), a very creepy humungous sunfish... then we went outside briefly (it was cold) and saw an otter playing in the bay. We saw anchovies swimming in silver circles. We touched bat rays, starfish, gumboot chitons, decorator crabs (which pick little bits of vegetation and attach them to hooks on their bodies for camoflauge), urchins, cow's tongue... then sweetie briefly wiped me off with a wadded up paper towel he picked up from god knows where.
We went into the auditorium to watch what we thought was going to be a short film on jellyfish, but in actuality it was a question and answer session with big gay Raoul. I just wanted melodic new agey music and footage of jellyfish, but I did pick up the powerful new terms "mouth-arms" and "mouth-anus." Yeah, jellyfish are simple, so their bits kind of have to multi-task. Then we watched otter feeding and training time! I've really been an otter fan for a long time. I had a Monterey Bay Aquarium otter t-shirt when I was about five, AND I remember it, which I think is telling. Anyway, it was totally cool, and I got one good picture before my camera batteries died.
Back at the kelp forest, I saw something odd. Sweetie had wandered a little bit away. I looked for a docent, and found a little old man in a red jacket who was currently helping another couple. When he finished, I began. "Excuse me," I said. "But why is there romaine lettuce attached to a string floating in the tank there?" He looked very surprised. We went over to examine. "Is it an elaborate prank, or is there some reason for it?" He looked very puzzled. There was, in fact, a floater with a string attached. At the bottom, there was a weight. All along the length, there were leaves of romaine, swaying in the movement of the water. Fortunately, some other people were wandering by who had just heard the story and were able to explain. Apparently, this isn't "kelp season," so there isn't enough to harvest, so they're seeing if the fish will eat lettuce instead. It looked strange.
Then we, um... we wandered around the aquarium a lot. I can't remember everything we saw. But I guarantee, if it lit up, spun, showed a short film, hid in the sand at the touch of a lever, got sucked into its exoskeleton with a pull, could be coaxed out of a wall, resembled a video game, or crashed over thick-walled glass, we participated in it. The photo is me sitting in a (fake and not to scale) penguin egg. I call it "I'm a penguin again" because there's another photo of me just like it in pink with long blond hair from last time we were here.
We came and checked into the hotel, which is okay -- the "high speed wireless internet" isn't really that fast or reliable. But it's warm and clean, so we're happy. For dinner we went to the Thai restaurant across the street. The service was a little unnerving, but the food was actually pretty good. It was only "white people" hot, but the veggies were all really fresh and perfectly done, and it was seasoned well. Unlike a few Thai restaurants I've been to, you can distinctly tell the difference between dishes. Some places it seems like everything is kind of the same. Then we took a walk around to partly burn off dinner. The conference is at the Marriot, which is very nearby and easily walkable.
Okay, I guess that's it. I'm sure I'll update more tomorrow.
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Happy Birthday to me!
Well, it would appear that my birthday started early! Sweetie gets SO anxious to give me my presents that I had to fend him off last Thursday, when he bought me one of them. He wanted to give it to me right then, and I said no, he had to wrap it and give it to me on my birthday. He insisted that I try it on, and I did, but then I gave it back. So last night, he's got another present for me. They're both wrapped and sitting on the living room table, and he's hopping around. He finally insists that the other one (the one that actually IS a surprise) is not a birthday present, but rather an I-love-you present, and therefore I can open it immediately. I finally give in, and my sweetie has bought me a cool-looking book called Londonstani. I'm looking forward to reading it, and hey, I can't really object to my birthday being stretched out to a week, can I?
I almost forgot -- both last week when we saw "The Pursuit of Happyness" and this week when we saw "Little Children," there were a TON of interesting-looking previews. But I wish they'd hand out little cards, or that I would remember to take notes. I always forget what the good movies were!
All right, gotta work.
I almost forgot -- both last week when we saw "The Pursuit of Happyness" and this week when we saw "Little Children," there were a TON of interesting-looking previews. But I wish they'd hand out little cards, or that I would remember to take notes. I always forget what the good movies were!
All right, gotta work.
Monday, January 08, 2007
"Little Children"
We went and saw the movie "Little Children." I would highly recommend it. It was so interesting to see characters that were written and performed with such complexity. I mean, the two main characters made bad decisions for the wrong reasons almost constantly, but that didn't mean they weren't appealing, or didn't have chemistry together. I also loved the effect of the narration. It worked really well to call attention to the movie-ness of it, and the sort of sociological aspects. There's a really telling scene with a book group, some funny stuff. (Although I must say that during a scene when I child sexual predator goes swimming at a pool, there was laughing in the audience as everyone got out of the pool. I wasn't sure what was funny, other than maybe the over(?)reaction...)
Sunday, January 07, 2007
My words!!!
A few months ago, I was talking about a new word I'd made up, recyclemmings, to describe the people who got faked into thinking it was recycling day just because some other people had mistakenly put their bins out. At that time, I mentioned there was a woman who wrote for the paper who made up words like that, but that hers were all really lame. Now, you can judge for yourself! These were in today's paper:
1. Absentdater: adjective. Regularly putting 2006 on your checks and other dated material when it's actually 2007.
2. cogiwater: verb. To ponder or meditate on whether to water your lawn during winter. (Usage: I cogiwatered. Is the lawn brown because it's dormant or should I turn the sprinklers on?)
3. snifflenoid: noun. To be a person who is extremely fearful of catching an illness from the snifflers, coughers, and sneezers who seem to surround you at work and home. (Usage: I washed my hands 10 times today because I was being a snifflenoid.)
4. snovocation: noun. The skier and snowboarder's prayer for snow at Lake Tahoe.
5. V2: abbreviated noun, short for vacation squared. The vacation you need to recover from the vacation you just had, especially one without any relatives.
Okay, for reals: I am obviously not a grammar nazi, but I am an English teacher, and let's start with #1. First, not an adjective. The word itself sounds like a noun, as in "I am an absentdater." But the definition is for a verb, because "putting" is a verb, and that is what your definition says it means. Perhaps you meant "absentdating?" Hard to say. Also, useless. A simple "oops" will suffice. Number two is at least the right part of speech. It's just utterly useless. You would say (because you are talking about your lawn, you boring motherfucker) "I don't know whether I need to water or not." The end.
Number three is also pretty useless. And the definition would be more accurate to its noun status if she just removed "To be" from the beginning. I can see how #4 might be interesting if I were a skier. And if you said "I need a V2" to someone, you would then have to add "A V2 is a vacation squared. It means I need a vacation to recover from my vacation." So, you know, it elongates what you're trying to say rather than getting to the point.
But I think recyclemmings and white herring could catch on. I really do. "I had to pull a white herring at work, because I had shit to do, and I didn't want my cube-mate talking at me all day." "The recyclemmings were out in force last night --- blue bins all down my street."
1. Absentdater: adjective. Regularly putting 2006 on your checks and other dated material when it's actually 2007.
2. cogiwater: verb. To ponder or meditate on whether to water your lawn during winter. (Usage: I cogiwatered. Is the lawn brown because it's dormant or should I turn the sprinklers on?)
3. snifflenoid: noun. To be a person who is extremely fearful of catching an illness from the snifflers, coughers, and sneezers who seem to surround you at work and home. (Usage: I washed my hands 10 times today because I was being a snifflenoid.)
4. snovocation: noun. The skier and snowboarder's prayer for snow at Lake Tahoe.
5. V2: abbreviated noun, short for vacation squared. The vacation you need to recover from the vacation you just had, especially one without any relatives.
Okay, for reals: I am obviously not a grammar nazi, but I am an English teacher, and let's start with #1. First, not an adjective. The word itself sounds like a noun, as in "I am an absentdater." But the definition is for a verb, because "putting" is a verb, and that is what your definition says it means. Perhaps you meant "absentdating?" Hard to say. Also, useless. A simple "oops" will suffice. Number two is at least the right part of speech. It's just utterly useless. You would say (because you are talking about your lawn, you boring motherfucker) "I don't know whether I need to water or not." The end.
Number three is also pretty useless. And the definition would be more accurate to its noun status if she just removed "To be" from the beginning. I can see how #4 might be interesting if I were a skier. And if you said "I need a V2" to someone, you would then have to add "A V2 is a vacation squared. It means I need a vacation to recover from my vacation." So, you know, it elongates what you're trying to say rather than getting to the point.
But I think recyclemmings and white herring could catch on. I really do. "I had to pull a white herring at work, because I had shit to do, and I didn't want my cube-mate talking at me all day." "The recyclemmings were out in force last night --- blue bins all down my street."
Thursday, January 04, 2007
I wrote a thing
I'm not 100% sure you'll be able to see this (for some parts of the site you have to register), but give it a shot.
Clicky for my article.
Clicky for my article.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
By the way,
I have two new pieces of internet news:
First, I'm now a member of "The People Under the Stairmasters." We blog about going to the gym.
Second, I'm a MOD. And not this kind.
No, I'm a moderator on a forum I go to, like, a lot. Funny thing is, it's a parenting forum. I was like "Are you sure you mean me?" But I'm the moderator of the "Trying to Conceive" forum, which makes sense. Anyway, the invitation was accompanied by much flattery, and I kind of feel cool now.
First, I'm now a member of "The People Under the Stairmasters." We blog about going to the gym.
Second, I'm a MOD. And not this kind.
No, I'm a moderator on a forum I go to, like, a lot. Funny thing is, it's a parenting forum. I was like "Are you sure you mean me?" But I'm the moderator of the "Trying to Conceive" forum, which makes sense. Anyway, the invitation was accompanied by much flattery, and I kind of feel cool now.
Dr. Who-a-thon
Hi all,
Well, I had a great time yesterday. Monkeygirl came over, and we went and got all sorts of junk food (Sweetie had already bought a lot, so we just bought more -- and drinks!), and then we had about a 5 hour Dr. Who marathon. We ate brie, bleu cheese, crackers, orange sodas, tiny little lattes, biscotti, chips... Oh, how we indulged! I started a fire in the fireplace and snuggled up next to it. We watched a bunch of episodes about an ancient Chinese god-thing looking for a time cabinet and sucking the lives out of some dried husks of Victorian women. And then there were some Daleks. I'm, uh, not a huge Dr. Who fan, but it was still a fun day.
Today I got my hair cut and colored, and I feel fabulous. I can't take pictures until Friday, because that's when I get my eyebrows done, and there will be no pictures of me until that is accomplished.
Then I met a friend who makes baby slings at a fabric store to pick out some fabric for a friend of mine whose shower is in a few weeks. Yay! Cute cherries...
And now we're going to make a pizza, then I go to ballet. So nothing amazing or monumental. It looks like the house will close today or tomorrow (thank gooodness).
That's it! Gotta clean the car out, because we're going to the bay area tomorrow. Whoo-hoo!
Well, I had a great time yesterday. Monkeygirl came over, and we went and got all sorts of junk food (Sweetie had already bought a lot, so we just bought more -- and drinks!), and then we had about a 5 hour Dr. Who marathon. We ate brie, bleu cheese, crackers, orange sodas, tiny little lattes, biscotti, chips... Oh, how we indulged! I started a fire in the fireplace and snuggled up next to it. We watched a bunch of episodes about an ancient Chinese god-thing looking for a time cabinet and sucking the lives out of some dried husks of Victorian women. And then there were some Daleks. I'm, uh, not a huge Dr. Who fan, but it was still a fun day.
Today I got my hair cut and colored, and I feel fabulous. I can't take pictures until Friday, because that's when I get my eyebrows done, and there will be no pictures of me until that is accomplished.
Then I met a friend who makes baby slings at a fabric store to pick out some fabric for a friend of mine whose shower is in a few weeks. Yay! Cute cherries...
And now we're going to make a pizza, then I go to ballet. So nothing amazing or monumental. It looks like the house will close today or tomorrow (thank gooodness).
That's it! Gotta clean the car out, because we're going to the bay area tomorrow. Whoo-hoo!
Monday, January 01, 2007
Movies, New Year
Heya,
I watched "An Inconvenient Truth." Was it an action-packed suspense-filled thriller? Uh, no. It was a PowerPoint presentation. Nevertheless, I found it really interesting, and I enjoyed it. Sweetie was teasing me about how boring Al Gore is, but I don't care -- I thought the movie was well-constructed and convincing. I mean, he's kind of preaching to the choir anyway, but I enjoyed seeing the data.
"Kinky Boots" had been on my Netflix list for a while, and Monkeygirl recommended it, so I boosted it to the top and I watched it the other night. I really enjoyed it. It had a lot of heart, and Chiwetel Ejiofor was fantastic. I actually really like the main guy, too. I don't know why, but he reminded me of the earnest little kid who played the kid in Peter Pan (Freddie Hightower, I think). Just kind of freckly and English and sincere. I liked it. I hate to be a SPOILER, but I was also happy when he broke up with harpy girlfriend. I think the filmmakers tipped us off that she was no good by giving her a sort of bitchy haircut. Anyway, it was predictable, but I liked it. A few minutes from the end, I was thinking "well, all we need now is a drag queen fashion show." And then there was one. Yay.
Well, it's 2007 now. We didn't do anything special for New Year's Eve -- I'm too old and tired! Why would I waste a perfectly good day off being tired from staying up too late the night before?! So we had some lambic (sweetie doesn't drink champagne after The Incident) and hit the sack at about 10:30. I wasn't even awakened by fireworks or (as at the old house) gunplay.
I'm not much of a resolution-maker. I think it causes you to focus too much on what's wrong in your life. There are things all of us need to change, but we already know what they are and are either working to change them or not. January first just doesn't mean anything. But it does seem a little like a good time to reflect. I had a great year overall. In January last year, I turned 30, and we had a great little party at the house. Monkeygirl brought a bunch of stuff over and we just hung out. In March we went to Point Reyes and had a great time. In April I went to Yosemite with the kids. In May, the Gynas officially broke up. It was sad, but we may have run our course, too. We weren't practicing, and everyone had big plans. In June Sweetie and I went to Hawaii and had the most fun in our upgraded super-good digs. We snorkeled and relaxed and did educational stuff. Ahhh....In July we were in hardcore home-improvement mode, getting the house ready to sell. Mom and I treated it like a full-time job, even working 6 days a week most of the time. We also found, bid on, and got our new house! It didn't close until the very end of August, but it was July when our offer was accepted. In August we really got ready to move, I dyed my hair dark for the first time (hey, it's important to ME), and I got ready for school. On Labor Day weekend, we moved. In October, my beloved dance teacher died, but we acted to keep the studio open, and it's still going strong now. November was busy -- I went on two weekend field trips to Point Reyes with the kids and wrote a 50,000 word novella! Sadly, Boompah's dad passed away this month, too. Finally in December, we got an offer on the house and sold it (I think -- knock wood still).
Were there things I wanted to happen this year that didn't? Of course, specifically one big one. But overall, that's a pretty goddamn good year. So goodbye 2006, welcome 2007. I can only hope that for everyone in my life, this year is calm and balanced, and that you get what you wish for. I think life is always a series of ups and downs, so I just hope there are more ups than downs and that the ups are bigger and more substantial.
I watched "An Inconvenient Truth." Was it an action-packed suspense-filled thriller? Uh, no. It was a PowerPoint presentation. Nevertheless, I found it really interesting, and I enjoyed it. Sweetie was teasing me about how boring Al Gore is, but I don't care -- I thought the movie was well-constructed and convincing. I mean, he's kind of preaching to the choir anyway, but I enjoyed seeing the data.
"Kinky Boots" had been on my Netflix list for a while, and Monkeygirl recommended it, so I boosted it to the top and I watched it the other night. I really enjoyed it. It had a lot of heart, and Chiwetel Ejiofor was fantastic. I actually really like the main guy, too. I don't know why, but he reminded me of the earnest little kid who played the kid in Peter Pan (Freddie Hightower, I think). Just kind of freckly and English and sincere. I liked it. I hate to be a SPOILER, but I was also happy when he broke up with harpy girlfriend. I think the filmmakers tipped us off that she was no good by giving her a sort of bitchy haircut. Anyway, it was predictable, but I liked it. A few minutes from the end, I was thinking "well, all we need now is a drag queen fashion show." And then there was one. Yay.
Well, it's 2007 now. We didn't do anything special for New Year's Eve -- I'm too old and tired! Why would I waste a perfectly good day off being tired from staying up too late the night before?! So we had some lambic (sweetie doesn't drink champagne after The Incident) and hit the sack at about 10:30. I wasn't even awakened by fireworks or (as at the old house) gunplay.
I'm not much of a resolution-maker. I think it causes you to focus too much on what's wrong in your life. There are things all of us need to change, but we already know what they are and are either working to change them or not. January first just doesn't mean anything. But it does seem a little like a good time to reflect. I had a great year overall. In January last year, I turned 30, and we had a great little party at the house. Monkeygirl brought a bunch of stuff over and we just hung out. In March we went to Point Reyes and had a great time. In April I went to Yosemite with the kids. In May, the Gynas officially broke up. It was sad, but we may have run our course, too. We weren't practicing, and everyone had big plans. In June Sweetie and I went to Hawaii and had the most fun in our upgraded super-good digs. We snorkeled and relaxed and did educational stuff. Ahhh....In July we were in hardcore home-improvement mode, getting the house ready to sell. Mom and I treated it like a full-time job, even working 6 days a week most of the time. We also found, bid on, and got our new house! It didn't close until the very end of August, but it was July when our offer was accepted. In August we really got ready to move, I dyed my hair dark for the first time (hey, it's important to ME), and I got ready for school. On Labor Day weekend, we moved. In October, my beloved dance teacher died, but we acted to keep the studio open, and it's still going strong now. November was busy -- I went on two weekend field trips to Point Reyes with the kids and wrote a 50,000 word novella! Sadly, Boompah's dad passed away this month, too. Finally in December, we got an offer on the house and sold it (I think -- knock wood still).
Were there things I wanted to happen this year that didn't? Of course, specifically one big one. But overall, that's a pretty goddamn good year. So goodbye 2006, welcome 2007. I can only hope that for everyone in my life, this year is calm and balanced, and that you get what you wish for. I think life is always a series of ups and downs, so I just hope there are more ups than downs and that the ups are bigger and more substantial.
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